Ok here it goes(Spoilers will happen but I don’t care), I’m going to try to be nice about this whole mess that was forced down our throats this time around. Well, that’s not a good start. Anyway, I recently sat down to watch X-Men: Days of future past (which will be shortened down to XDOFP). I told many that I was not going to see this, but I got tricked into seeing it because it was Ken’s birthday and I promised to hangout, then later he dropped the bomb that we were going to see XDOFP, Ken and his tricky words.
So, I will start off by saying I didn’t hate the whole thing. I didn’t like it as a whole, there were parts that I enjoyed. Quicksilver was the best thing about this movie, and he was only in it for like 5-7 minutes. He’s a much different take on the character then we will most likely see in Avengers: Age of Ultron and far from the comic pages. A lot of the times that’s what bothers me, but in this case it was refreshing. In this version he was american and didn’t know his father, we also don’t know if the little girl shown with him later in the film is supposed to be his sister Wanda, obviously not his twin sister. I hated the way he looked, everything from his awful wig to his shiny clothes. I’ll only mention the goggles. When he used his powers it was pretty awesome, they essentially showed you both sides of it. To him everything comes to almost a dead stop, but to everyone else he’s beyond a blur. He blows by people knocking them over, its pretty fun. I liked the scene in the kitchen when he goes super speed and changes what people and objects are doing. He redirects bullets and makes people punch themselves or others around them. He makes an off handed comment about the fact his mom knew a guy that could control metal, after seeing Magneto use his abilities. People laughed because Magneto is his father, well he’s supposed to be. As for the rest of the new characters we get to “meet” on this downward spiral. In the future/present, because I’m not to sure which it is. We get a glimpse of Blink, Warpath, Sunspot and Bishop. Blink is the best of these “new” mutants. They find some creative ways to use her teleportation powers, but for the most part they fall short use actual use. I’ll give you an example. When the Future Sentinels attack for the first time, she makes portals to escape further into their stronghold, an ok use as a defense. But as an offensive weapon, all she does is open portals to allow others like Colossus to strike at the sentinels from off angles. Piss poor excuse for an offensive weapon. Sure later in the film she makes one sentinel punch another and redirects an energy blast from one to another, but she could be chopping them up by opening and closing portals on them until there was nothing left of them. The sentinels have no means of flight so she could have teleported them off the side of the cliff they were on. Next we have Warpath, they got very few things right with this one. He was played by an actor that is nowhere close to being tall enough, so they didn’t even try to make him look bigger. That actor was under 6 feet tall, Warpath is over 7 feet tall and weighs in at a good 350lbs. Now I know finding an actor that measures up is practically impossible but you can use camera tricks or computers to do what needs to be done. Fuck they did it in Harry Potter and in Lord of the rings. Not that hard really. As for his “powers”? Not to sure they even tried, at one point he looks really hard into the distance and see’s the sentinel ships inbound. That’s about it, he barely could fight and what little he did of that was easily thwarted by the ridiculously over powered sentinels (I’ll come back to these pieces of shit later). Yuck! Who's next, Sunspot. The “We wish we had the Human Torch” part of the cast. He looked cool, that’s about it. He made shit hot with his powers. Now on to Bishop, not good. They almost got his abilities right, he can absorb energy that is directed towards him and then uses it to shoot energy blast out of his body. Basically he shoots what looks like lasers out from his fists, not out of some gun that’s plugged into him, he’s not a goddamn battery. Plus he’s super ripped, unlike the actor who played him in the movie.
Now for the Sentinels. They got the name right, that’s it. Wrong size, wrong capabilities and wrong type of threat. In XDOFP they were robots made of a new non-metal material, that somehow didn’t consist of any metal even in the computer systems they had to have in them to be radio controlled and I’m just guessing power them. This was of course to combat against the only real mutant Trask knew of, Magneto. Because he controls metal. No metal no problem, right? Dumb, just dumb. That’s just one of so many plot holes found in this civ of a movie, this thing had plot-hole diarrhea. As for the size in the movie they were maybe 12-15 feet tall, in the comic books they dwarf skyscrapers and have mutant holding cells in their chest to hold captured mutants until they return to the prison camps. The main reason they are a threat is the sheer size and strength they have. They shoot lasers that are so powerful they knock down mutants. They don’t somehow change their physical attributes to counteract the powers of the mutants they are fighting. On that note, how the fuck do you get from the fact that Mystique can change her physical appearance into the ability of machines to change from one material to another. One is genetics and the other is mechanical. I’m all about Pseudoscience in movies and stuff, but that’s one hell of a leap. How does Mystique’s DNA help you figure out how to make a machine change is physical makeup into something completely different. Like changing ice into fire. Talk about putting the square peg threw the round hole. Not to mention that Magneto was able to take control of the sentinels just by pulling up railroad tracks and apparently completely rewiring their controls to do what ever he said. God awful! Comic books fans and writers should be upset at just this, but don’t worry there is a whole lot more.
As for the returning cast. They were pretty much useless and under utilized. Old man Magneto did the most damage but was still grossly overpowered by the future death machines known as the Sentinels. I won’t go over all the character flaws and mistakes made, even from movie to movie. I’m going to end on the things that really bothered me about the movie now.
I’m not to sure which of these things bothered me the most but they all drove me to the breaking point where in I almost yelled out in the theater. Where to start? I guess I’ll start with the serum Hank/Beast made to help him look normal and somehow helps Professor X walk after being crippled in First Crap in mean Class. So the serum in question holds back the X-gene but makes the body heal itself? Firstly, Beast’s blue skin and hair aren’t caused by the x-gene, it was caused by an attempt to alter his base DNA to hide his physical deformation, the large feet he had. This came about in first class when he was trying to find a way for Mystique to appear human instead of being blueish and naked all the time. I still hate how the y changed Beast in these movies, he’s nothing close to the source material. So in XDOFP Hank creates this temporary cure that can quell the effects of physical aliments like his blue fluff and Charles’s being crippled, but Chuck takes more of it than Hank intended so he loses his abilities while juiced up. Stupid is as stupid does. Hank may not be blue but Charles is now just a drunk. If this “cure” works why not use it to stop Magneto or Mystique from using their powers to do bad stuff. Whatever, make Chuck a druggy so he doesn’t have the ability to find Mystique, I get it, you needed that to drive the “plot”. Hacks, all of them, that’s the best you can come up with. Mystique leaves Chuck and he just dives into the bottom of the closest bottle. One of the smartest men ever to live just gives up. It’s such crap. Not to mention that in the original story Kitty Pride is the one that goes back to convince every one of future events not Wolverine. But they want to make Wolverine the main attraction for the franchise. Yes Hugh does good job as Logan but you have an amazing cast that is always put on the back burner so Wolverine can be front and center. Guess what guys? Without the Adamantium on his bones he’s pretty much just a dude with bone claws that can heal. Lame. I still don’t like the fact they went with bone claws, I hated that about the origin movies. His mutant ability has and always will be his advanced healing factor. Read a goddamn book will you. Next on my hate list for this movie, this one’s a quick one. At one point in the movie Logan is talking to Young Chuck and tells him when this is all over he needs to remember a few names. Jean, Scott and Storm. What the fuck guys, Storm isn’t her name you idiots. Jean and Scott are their names. Storm’s name is Ororo! She has a name use it. Sloppy fucking writing, that’s what that is. Next is that fact that this whole movie is an excuse to erase all the shitty movies that took place in-between X2 and now. Hey here’s a thought, just reboot the whole goddamned thing. That would get rid of all the damage Captain Rush Hour did with Last Stand. It allows you to retell a good Wolverine origin and not fuck with what little continuity you had. But no, not FOX. They just need to give it up and let Marvel save them from themselves.
I would continue, but I’m pretty sure not to many people have even made it this far, so I will just sum it up here with, I hate this movie. I know I said earlier that I didn’t hate the whole thing, but just writing this and having to remember details made me hate it more. There aren’t perfect movies out there, well except Winter Soldier that was a perfect movie. But this left me disappointed at every turn. Even the post-credit scene was garbage. No context at all, not a single person I talked to knew that was supposed to be Apocalypse and his 4 horsemen. The CG was awful and it looked like he was playing Minecraft. Bryan Singer and the writers should be black balled from all things X-men. Mathew Vaughn didn’t want to come back because he knew it was just circling the drain. But due to people being either desperate to see their favorite characters on the big screen or just not knowing better have kept this nightmare alive. Money is the ultimate evil, and it has reared it’s ugly face yet again.
That’s it for now, if you’ve made it this far thanks for reading and let me know your thoughts on this and the movie. I’ll answer any question you have.
C.O.D.Y.
