redappolyon

So I was talking and hanging out with this girl I met at the bar. Problem was she's married. Our conversations bordered on infidelity. Last night I was out with her and her friend and I got called out by one of her friends she's known for a long time. In that moment I realized how wrong I was and I just left. I feel aweful. I also most broke my personal rules and code AGAIN. On one side I'm happy I got out of there, and on the other side (the more prevelant one right now) I'm so saddened and beaten inside. I have doubts right now to my abilities to ever find true and honest love. That all I want, someone to love and hold for the rest of my life. I just want to cry.