recordandplay

Wow...so I just had the most important conversation with Jeremy. I was completely honest with him about how I feel. We really are on the same page. He isn't ready to stop anything yet - and neither am I. We both had conversations with people this weekend that were very similar...they went something like this:
"So you guys are only friends...but practically best friends"
- "Yeah."
"And you have incredible sex?"
- "It's pretty damn good."
"And you don't argue?"
- "Never."
"Well I don't get it. That makes no sense."
I love Jeremy. I care about him. We are wonderfully sexually attracted to eachother. And I am not in love with him whatsoever. He is not my boyfriend. I finally told him all of this...and he not only understands, he agrees. I said to him, "I have yet to feel bad about you. Certain situations we are in together have made me feel bad, but everytime I look back, YOU have never made me feel badly."
His response, "I know. I agree, I have never really felt badly about you. I like you. Once or twice I have felt smothered and once or twice I have felt bored. But I have never had a problem with you."
I said, "Exactly. I know I have smothered you - I could tell, and I hope I stopped. And I felt bored once or twice, too. Especially over the summer. But Jeremy, you are awesome. I like you. You never annoy me. You make me happy. Nearly everyone I meet bothers me somehow and you don't. It's a damn shame we aren't closer because of these stupid circumstances."

We're talking more tomorrow. IT FELT SO GOOD. This is important. I don't care if people think we are weird. We have something awesome, and even if it isn't based on romantic love - it is a very good thing. We care about eachother, we have incredible sex, and we are wonderful friends. THAT IS AWESOME. Fuck you, stupid people who aid my crazy thoughts.