I guess it's hard for me, at this point, being unable to distinguish between something that makes a difference in the real world and some silly chemical reatcion in my brain. Maybe what I need it to be loved by a woman that I love in return, or maybe what I'm supposed to feel right now is misery, for no real reason. I don't debate that my life isn't that aweful, that I have no real right to complain. And yet, I'm going completely insane, unable to figure out what it is about me that's so repulsive. I'm losing touch with what has, up until now, made sense, and once that's gone, I'll have nothing binding me to the things that seem so important now, and, so, nothing limiting me. I'll be without limits, and I'll push towards my impulse, striving and driving at my own obsession. this is the best and only way i can describe what I am, and how it relates to what I might be in the future.
Is there a failure here? If so, where does it lie?
Is there a failure here? If so, where does it lie?
There is absolutely nothing wrong with going with impulses..most of us lose touch with that pretty quick and wonder how to get back to it or how to feel like ourselves again. I also think that our life (in terms of happiness) is based on obsession to obsession. I truely doubt there is anything repulsive about you, especially if you are basing it on one persons judgement. I think if anything, you're just lonely right now and overanalyzing yourself.
Have you ever taken a personality test? I find them extemely interesting and it is a major form of therapy in the psych. world It's a great way to show the way you percieve things and possible patterns of behavior.
www.humanmetrics.com
a good follow site once you get your score is - www.typelogic.com
fyi- I'm an INFP
[Edited on Jun 09, 2006 9:41PM]