ravensmoon

Thought for the day; . . There is more money being spent on breast
implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by
2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and
huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

Humor
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do...
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PONDERISMS
>
> I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people
> die of natural causes.
>
> Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are
> removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes
> out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant....
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You're Pet's Diaries

As seen in dog's diary:
7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm -...
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Humor
A beautiful woman went to the gynecologist. The doctor took one
Look at the woman and all his professionalism flew out the
Window. He immediately told her to get undressed.

After she disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. While
Doing so he asked her, "Do you know what I am doing?"

"Yes," she replied, "You are checking for abrasions or
Dermatological abnormalities."...
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9 Things I Hate About Everyone



1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?



2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse...
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It's so rare, given the basic tenor of most arguments in politics today, but every once in a while someone says something so remarkable that's it's worth noting, without any comment at all.

Such a situation took place on March 1st in Annapolis, Maryland, where a hearing on a proposed constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage was taking place.


The far right wing was doing...
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Humor
The President, First Lady and Dick Cheney were flying on Air Force One.
George looked at Laura, chuckled and said, "You know, I could throw a
$1,000
bill out of the window right now and make somebody very happy."

Laura shrugged her shoulders and replied, "I could throw ten $100 bills
out
of the window and make ten people very happy."

Cheney added, "That...
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>1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make
>love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine
>and skin smooth.
>=============

>2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering
>dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the
>pores and makes your skin glow.
>=============
>3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on...
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Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Tequila.

Tequila is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Tequila can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell...
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Ya Know I have come to the conclusion That I dislike packing, the only thing worse perhaps would be unpacking. Were packing to move to our new apartment this weekend and there is so much to do, between work, Dr's Appointments, and packing that I suspect when the move is complete, and everything put in its new home, that I shall very much like to...
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Got the Apartment paid the deposit Moving this coming weekend. Everythings good!