Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.
1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [x] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other
First Name: Alacoque
Last Name: Apacolypse
Password: F*** **U (max 8. char)
Code name: The One
Latitude/Longitude/Altitude: 35 41.75 x 119 03.69 @ 666 Ft.
2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
[_] F-16 Falcon
[_] F-117A Stealth
[x] Classified
3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2005/12/02
4. Serial Number: RF6OA6LC6LE
5. Please check where this product was purchased:
[_] Received as gift/aid package
[_] Catalog showroom
[_] Independent arms broker
[_] Mail order
[_] Discount store
[_] Government surplus
[x] Classified
6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you
have just purchased:
[_] Heard loud noise, looked up
[_] Store display
[x] Espionage
[_] Recommended by friend/relative/ally
[_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
[_] Was attacked by one
7. Please check the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision
to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
[_] Style/appearance
[x] Speed/maneuverability
[_] Price/value
[_] Comfort/convenience
[_] Kickback/bribe
[_] Recommended by salesperson
[_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
[x] Advanced Weapons Systems
[_] Backroom politics
[_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
[_] North America
[x] Iraq
[x] Iraq
[_] Aircraft carrier
[x] Iraq
[_] Europe
[x] Iraq
[_] Middle East (not Iraq)
[x] Iraq
[_] Africa
[x] Iraq
[_] Asia/Far East
[x] Iraq
[_] Misc. Third World countries
[x] Iraq
[_] Classified
[x] Iraq
9. Please check the products that you currently own or intend to purchase
in the near future:
[_] Color TV
[_] VCR
[_] ICBM
[x] Killer Satellite
[_] CD Player
[_] Air-to-Air Missiles
[_] Space Shuttle
[_] Home Computer
[x] Nuclear Weapon
10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Check all that apply)
[_] Communist/Socialist
[_] Terrorist
[_] Crazed
[_] Neutral
[_] Democratic
[_] Dictatorship
[x] Corrupt
[_] Primitive/Tribal
11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
[_] Deficit spending
[x] Cash
[_] Suitcases of cocaine
[_] Oil revenues
[_] Personal check
[_] Credit card
[x] Ransom money
[_] Traveler's check
12. Your occupation:
[_] Homemaker
[_] Sales/marketing
[_] Revolutionary
[_] Clerical
[_] Mercenary
[x] Spy Hunter
[_] Tyrant
[_] Middle management
[_] Eccentric billionaire
[_] Defense Minister/General
[_] Retired
[_] Student
13. To help us understand our customers' lifestyles, please indicate the
interests and activities in which you and your family/friends/allies enjoy participating on a regular basis:
[_] Golf
[_] Boating/sailing
[x] Sabotage
[_] Running/jogging
[_] Propaganda/disinformation
[x] Destabilization/overthrow
[_] Default on loans
[_] Gardening
[_] Crafts
[_] Black market / smuggling
[_] Collectibles / collections
[_] Watching sports on TV
[x] Wines
[x] Interrogation/torture
[_] Household pets
[_] Crushing rebellions
[x] Espionage/reconnaissance
[_] Fashion clothing
[_] Border disputes
[_] Mutually Assured Destruction
Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
Comments or suggestions about our fighter jets? Please write to:
McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
Marketing Department
Military Aerospace Division
635 S. Santa Rosa Blvd.
La Jolla, CA 92092
1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [x] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other
First Name: Alacoque
Last Name: Apacolypse
Password: F*** **U (max 8. char)
Code name: The One
Latitude/Longitude/Altitude: 35 41.75 x 119 03.69 @ 666 Ft.
2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
[_] F-16 Falcon
[_] F-117A Stealth
[x] Classified
3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2005/12/02
4. Serial Number: RF6OA6LC6LE
5. Please check where this product was purchased:
[_] Received as gift/aid package
[_] Catalog showroom
[_] Independent arms broker
[_] Mail order
[_] Discount store
[_] Government surplus
[x] Classified
6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you
have just purchased:
[_] Heard loud noise, looked up
[_] Store display
[x] Espionage
[_] Recommended by friend/relative/ally
[_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
[_] Was attacked by one
7. Please check the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision
to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
[_] Style/appearance
[x] Speed/maneuverability
[_] Price/value
[_] Comfort/convenience
[_] Kickback/bribe
[_] Recommended by salesperson
[_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
[x] Advanced Weapons Systems
[_] Backroom politics
[_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
[_] North America
[x] Iraq
[x] Iraq
[_] Aircraft carrier
[x] Iraq
[_] Europe
[x] Iraq
[_] Middle East (not Iraq)
[x] Iraq
[_] Africa
[x] Iraq
[_] Asia/Far East
[x] Iraq
[_] Misc. Third World countries
[x] Iraq
[_] Classified
[x] Iraq
9. Please check the products that you currently own or intend to purchase
in the near future:
[_] Color TV
[_] VCR
[_] ICBM
[x] Killer Satellite
[_] CD Player
[_] Air-to-Air Missiles
[_] Space Shuttle
[_] Home Computer
[x] Nuclear Weapon
10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Check all that apply)
[_] Communist/Socialist
[_] Terrorist
[_] Crazed
[_] Neutral
[_] Democratic
[_] Dictatorship
[x] Corrupt
[_] Primitive/Tribal
11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
[_] Deficit spending
[x] Cash
[_] Suitcases of cocaine
[_] Oil revenues
[_] Personal check
[_] Credit card
[x] Ransom money
[_] Traveler's check
12. Your occupation:
[_] Homemaker
[_] Sales/marketing
[_] Revolutionary
[_] Clerical
[_] Mercenary
[x] Spy Hunter
[_] Tyrant
[_] Middle management
[_] Eccentric billionaire
[_] Defense Minister/General
[_] Retired
[_] Student
13. To help us understand our customers' lifestyles, please indicate the
interests and activities in which you and your family/friends/allies enjoy participating on a regular basis:
[_] Golf
[_] Boating/sailing
[x] Sabotage
[_] Running/jogging
[_] Propaganda/disinformation
[x] Destabilization/overthrow
[_] Default on loans
[_] Gardening
[_] Crafts
[_] Black market / smuggling
[_] Collectibles / collections
[_] Watching sports on TV
[x] Wines
[x] Interrogation/torture
[_] Household pets
[_] Crushing rebellions
[x] Espionage/reconnaissance
[_] Fashion clothing
[_] Border disputes
[_] Mutually Assured Destruction
Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
Comments or suggestions about our fighter jets? Please write to:
McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
Marketing Department
Military Aerospace Division
635 S. Santa Rosa Blvd.
La Jolla, CA 92092
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
now get in your super sleek aircraft and fly over here already!