random_j

I did it off my own back because of my depression, I had gone the meds route before. I guess there came a point when I started not wanting to wake up or to just let go of the wheel when driving that I thought I had better do something.

I got lucky too, I googled to find someone and he is perfect for me. Way it goes I guess.

Looking back I was really fucking ill at the time, I couldn't interact with anyone and I was having anxiety attacks. It didn't cure my depression, I guess it helped me to understand myself and make a decision that I don't want to and don't have to be in that place.

My depression pretty much stemmed from not recognising my feelings, let alone dealing with them. I surpressed all emotion from guilt to joy and sadness.

I never even contemplated just how much of my life it affected, I used to do things without realising which were pretty negative.

I went back into therapy cos loads of bad shit happened, I did it to make sure I didn't end up in that place again and dealt with it.
Like you, I find it difficult to really sit down and talk to anyone about my emotions, but then I am so much better at it now than I was.

I'd always recomend anyone struggling to deal with feelings to seek help, if only to be told "you're gonna be fine - its normal"
I'df also say do a bit of research into the types of therapy first, CBT or transactional analysis. The first session is normally about getting to know eachother and talking through what to expect and whether there would be any benefit in it.