rainwolfkin

i had a friend once. we'll just call him 'kyle'. kyle was a great guy. i knew him before i had ever smoked my first cigarette. he has never smoked cigarettes. he has, however, participated in a lot of other bodily polluting activities. i asked kyle once, "what's it like to trip out on LSD?"

kyle, being the thoughtful (as in full of thoughts) person that he was, took a moment before selected carefully prepared words to describe something so subjective and just plain mind alteringly wierd. he replied, "it's really hard to describe."

i found this answer to be unsatifactory.

later in life, i met a beautiful girl unto whom i asked the same question. she replied, "eat this".

i was satisfied with the response. however, i was still unsatisfied with my relatively limited lack of experience in the department. so i ate some more.

one day, i said, "hey kyle, do you want to eat some acid and then ride roller coasters."

thoughtful kyle discussed this with himself in his head for a few moments. he replied, "yes".

so, we got in the car and drove down to the city to meet up with some 'friends' from which we acquired some 'stuff'. then we went home.

the next morning, we got back in the car. and i drove up to Cedar Point. Cedar Point just happens to be the best amusement park in the world. the roller coasters resident here are among the world's greatest. i do believe that the place holds 2/3 of the world's records for such rides.

so, we get to the amusement park. and then we drop some acid. a surreal day ensued.

amusement parks are known for having those speakers everywhere. the kind that advertise crap and tell you all about the statistics of the rides and whatnot. those speakers in themselves caused us many problems. with so many voices coming at us from all directions it was impossible to know who was talking to us and who was just standing there. after a good 40 minutes of asking each other "what?" and responding to each other with "i didn't say anything", we mutually and silently agreed that perhaps it was better not to talk.

i would also like to add that when one's pupils are dialated as they are when tripping, the sun casts a weird light on everything. we considered not 'seeing' as well as not talking, but in the end decided that such a plan was going to be too difficult to carry out.

LSD also makes one paranoid. especially when in crowded places. this is hard to deal with at the best of times. when standing in one of those lines that zigzag back and forth for miles and miles bringing you ever close to the ride just to take you ever farther from it and back again, it is almost impossible to deal with. with each zigzag, we passed the same people over and over again. we were certain that everyone knew what we had done and we were being followed. we spent a lot of time trying to 'act normal'. and even more time looking at our feet. which seemed much squishier that usual.

the most upsetting aspect of the day for me happened when we were nearing the end of a line and about 5 people away from being able to board one of the rides. a lady who had been standing next to me, and creeping me out by staring at me all too often for the preceding hour and a half, tapped me on the shoulder. when i turned around to see what she wanted she said, "wa wa waa waa wa."

i think my eyes fell out of my sockets. i turned to the ever thoughtful kyle, expressed my shock to him and asked him what the lady had said. kyle seemed to be taking a break from thinking as his response was "i can't help you on this one".

immediately my mind pondered the inconsistency i was experiencing in the world of sound. kyle's words were distinctly clear. as were the words of the rest of the world around me. so i turned back to the lady, apologized and asked her to repeat. she repeated. all i heard was wa-waa's. i felt like i was in an episode of charlie brown.

this conversation continued for a few more cylces of asking what and getting ever more perturbed repetitions of whatever this lady was trying to express to me.

my feelings of desperation were growing. also mostly unbelievably so. it was so crowded, not to mention that we were in a rigidly guarded queuing system making the possibility of somewhere else to run to very slim indeed.

but in my desperation, i did find somewhere to run too. just as a new set of cars were arriving at the edge of the platform and other people were boarding, i grabbed kyle's hand and pushed the 5 people in front of us out of the way and jumped into one of the cars.

we sat there shaking for a while thinking "please dont confront me, please dont confront me, please dont confront me" and to our relief, the car pulled off and we began our ride.

such instances were far more mind blowing and 'alternate reality like' than the actual rides themselves and we were rather disappointed. but we stuck it out. and at the end of the day, we got back in the car.

when we did so, we realised the error of our ways. (or one of the many errors of our ways, actually). we hadn't thought about how we would make it home. home was 3.5 hours away by car. we were hallucinating. all of our sensory perceptions were far from being normal.

we decided that we would give it a go anyway and kyle would support me in my driving skills. the journey home consisted of moments where we would be sitting in the left hand turn lane and awaiting a green light. a green arrow would light up pointing me right. and following orders like the good girl i was, even though they seemed slightly dangerous--like turning into oncoming traffic--i would begin turning right. this would result in kyle screaming "oh god no! what are you doing!" which would result with me stopping the car in the middle of a busy intersection and asking him what he was talking about. at which point he would tell me to turn left. and i would. obiediant me. the next few miles would usually involve little thought dedicated to driving and much thought dedicated to me saying "but the arrow told me to go right" and kyle saying "but the arrow told you to go left".

either way, we did make it home safely where we experienced a lot of other wierd happenings.

but i would like to take this time to mention how dangerous our actions were. not only to ourselves, but to others. and i dont recommend anyone doing anything simliar to this.

i would also like to state for the record, that i no longer smoke cigarettes and that LSD is the dirtiest drug on the planet and no one should ever touch the stuff. the after effects never cease. i know. please, dont do acid. (but tell me a funny story about a time that you did, if you have one).