raen

I wouldn't even say money is the issue... it's the fact that I have to work at something else when wishing to work at what I want and get paid for it. It's being stuck there. A nurse on my floor just finished reading my book and asked the question I keep getting asked... why are you here? I have to eat. I need power and water. Gotta pay back those loans that got me through college which I attended to do something not related to what I'm doing. It's ironic, things solidify for me when everything falls apart. I seem to thrive on crisis; a coworker and I decided years ago we needed to be stormchasers because we enjoyed sandbagging the doors of our store during hurricane evacuations more than our daily work there. It's the mundane, day to day trials that drive me to emergency rooms with anxiety. The quest for money is what has driven me to a standstill. It's trite, but I had this belief that the lottery millions were mine. In my very soul I feel it was to come to pass. It has driven me to sit back a wait. It has robbed me of attempting anything, which is bad since even rich I wouldn't find purpose with my life, only a way out. Money is nice, but I'd prefer being me now and being able to weave tales and creating my inner world, unhindered.

Your therapist gives you books to read, my doctor (nurse practitioner, actually) prescriped me psychotropic drugs (of which I'm trying not to take). Hope your reading is getting better results.


Tithing Time? I've added another since then, too; Love of Country. You can find them both here

By the way, had a dream the other night that would make an interesting tale. I'm hoping to start it this weekend (after the work days are over; and what a coincidence, it's about the end of the world).

SG is one of the few really Mac-friendly sites out there (I think the whole thing is set up on Macs) so, I guess somewhat unfairly, I compare its performance to Apple's homepage... if I can access Apple Home and then the webstore before I get to my journal I become pissed.

I would use Meriam-Webster's site but I can't justify going there without having a word to look up.

I don't risk joining BSG around here. I'm not hip enough to be up to date.

Had a bad experience in the Buffy/Angel group... I really liked the show but missed the last 2-3 seasons (because I thought it got stupid); I have the seasons but haven't watched them and was getting a lot of spoilers.

And I can't watch them because I'm in the middle of watching BSG... what a vicious cycle it is


Besides Jack Lelanne, did you know Elvira, Mistress of Darkness is pushing 60?! There's a new reality show where they're picking a newer Valley Goth Girl (Halloween fever's getting me... I'm crushing on Cassandra Peterson right now).

Hope all that shooting and toning is going well. And you speak of it with such passion... wish I had THAT!

Adama gives Lee a lighter that belonged to his grandfather, tells his son to get some sleep before the raid on the Cylon trilium mine in an asteroid belt, begins making his way out of the hangar.

Lee: Dad... I'll bring this back
Adama: You better. I'll kick your ass. It's a good lighter.

I nearly fell off the couch when I heard that. Stoic ol' Adama. I'm finishing up Season 1 still; Dr. Baltar was just elected vice president (he's such a slime but so damn likable) and he hasn't blown the whistle on Boomer being a Cylon. Colonel Tigh and his wife are together again (that was an interesting episode). I'm trying to figure out how Helo, if he escapes Caprica, will rejoin the crew and I'm fearing a relationship between Lee and Kara (I think I slipped up and figured out that will happen later). Honestly, that's the only problem I could have with the show so far. I want to soak up everything I can but I don't want to slip up and see/read something about what I haven't seen yet. I even fast forward through the intro that highlights moment in the proceeding episode. I'm trying to ration myself. I'm not above watching three episodes at a time.

I found a scale model of Battlestar Pegasus in the store the other day... but no Galactica

As someone who followed both Buffy and Angel and Firefly (I'm even collecting the seasons of MacGyver) I have no right to use the "d" word. I find little bits that remind me of Firefly (particularly the cinematography, beautiful work). But I'm wondering how long they can keep it up. I gave up on Buffy and Angel long before they ran their course because they gave up on fans; the stories weren't the same and the characters had become the actors. I'm hoping since most the cast are character actors that they don't falter, nor their love for doing the show. It worried me since I read some where it was questionable that Olmos wouldn't come back after the miniseries.

I've never started a successful manuscript with any idea how I would finish it. Apparently if you have a place for it to go you lose creativity. And I always make it up as a go. Sounds like the correct way to approach a book/screenplay

And I just finished season 1. I wasn't expecting that ending! It took every bit of my will to restrain myself from plunging on into season 2... I do have to act productive now and again.

It has been my experience that a lot of people who are down and out choose to be that way. The only time I've seen something good is when I was at the Outer Banks many years with my family. We had just eaten at Pizza Hut, got a To Go box and driving along the boulevard saw a man with a cardboard sign saying "will work for food." My father pulled over and the guy showed a picture of him and his daughter (we guessed his wife was holding the camera). We gave what we had left and he was very appreciative. It seems everyone else I've met reveled in their bumhood.


Otherwise...

I should have listened to you earlier, really, really should have. Having just picked up iLife '08 I was creating some DVDs (a process that takes upwards of four hours for each disk), just sitting doing nothing and I thought "now would be a perfect time to get started on Battlestar Galactica. Wow. I just got through the miniseries but it had me from the first scene. I can't remember the last show that has done that. I have seasons one and two now so I feel a lot of time will be spent on the couch. And during these hot summer days, what more should I do.


So, somewhat belated, thanks for steering me towards some good television

oh harry potter... hmm... he's just.. so heroic and magical... or something like that haha

not a canon shooter at all... oh god i wish i had a canon. i just have a little point and shoot.

I also picked up Battlestar Galactica yesterday