so it begins to look like i've been keeping in touch with the wrong friends, the ones who cause me pain and horror, and not the ones who make me a better person in spite of myself.
so, do i ditch people? not really. but i do seek out those old relationships, warm them over, realize how far i've come in a few short, and increasingly fast years. and i look for who i wanted to be in those days, and i find myself not so far from that goal. ::smiles:: but of course, everything is relative.
so, do i ditch people? not really. but i do seek out those old relationships, warm them over, realize how far i've come in a few short, and increasingly fast years. and i look for who i wanted to be in those days, and i find myself not so far from that goal. ::smiles:: but of course, everything is relative.
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no, actually i meant emotionally, pain as in, "i hope you honestly have no clue how much what you just said hurts me or else i will have to conclude you are the most selfish bitch in the world" and emotional horror as in"how can you force yourself to live with lies all the time, never allowing yourself happiness because it would be inconsistent?"
scary stuff like that. not that i actually say those things outloud to anyone. the people who would need to hear it aren't members.