1. Do you type really fast?
Yes, somewhere between 100-120 WPM
2. Does it annoy people who are around you (like in the library)?
I never use library computers... I don't know about my co-workers. But my home keyboard is rubbery and roll-up so it makes no noise when I type on it.
3. Did you like high school?
No.
4. How old are you?
21! OLD ENOUGH TO GO TO HOOTERS
5. Do you know anyone who has the same birthday as you?
No.
6. Favorite pen color?
I'll have to go with black.
7. What word do you constantly misspell when typing?
teh
8. Do you have trees in your yard?
I have a 1 bedroom apartment that costs me $800/month. I should have a yard.
9. Name one comedian that everyone thinks is funny but you absolutely cannot stand.
Wanda Sykes
10. Name one director you hate and tell why.
The guy who made "Gummo." All of his movies are pretty terrible. 'Kids' was okay.
11. Do you like Tim Burton?
Tim Burton's films are okay.
12. What annoys you more than anything?
The fact that I cannot make people rational and I have fleeting control over my own life.
13. Tell me about the weirdest pair of socks you own.
I have striped Hello Pirate Kitty knee-socks. Serious!
14. If you woke up tomorrow morning as the opposite sex, what would you do first?
GROSS WHY IS THERE A HOLE THERE
15. Did you read fear street books?
No, I read Goosebumps though.
16. How about Sweet Valley High?
No.
17. Babysitter's club? the Boxcar Children?
Nope.
18. Goosebumps?
YES
19. Favorite show on Nickelodeon?
What's on Nickelodeon these days?
20. Did you watch Are you Afraid of the Dark?
Yes
21. Did Zeebo the Clown scare you?
Yes
22. Where do you vacation every summer?
I don't really ever vacation.
23. Do you like the beach?
It's alright in small amounts.
24. Do you tan or burn easily?
I don't know... I'm never in the sun.
25. Do you make up your own words and lingo?
Yes!
26. Do you eat lots of TV dinners?
No
27. Favorite Hot Pocket flavor?
Turkey + Bacon + Cheese. I haven't had a hot pocket in forever!
28. If you could make one celebrity magically disappear, who would it be?
I can't really think of who infuriates me the most... Oprah is pretty annoying though. DID YOU KNOW SHE DOESN'T LIKE THINGS SOMETIMES?!?!?!?!
29. How is life treating you?
Eh. I have a pretty good job at least.
30. Do people like you?
I don't know.
31. What do you think it is that makes the "popular" people popular?
Typically because they were the most talkitive at school.
32. What do you wear the most: jeans, cords, dickies, khakis, skirts, or shorts?
Hmm... Slacks.
33. Are you using a PC or Mac?
PC! But I have two other PCs. And two Macs.
34. Do you like chunky peanut butter?
YES. I also have taken to eating giant bags of peanuts in the shell. It's delicious and entertaining!
35. What amazes you about the opposite sex?
WOMEN AREN'T MAGICAL
37. Do you like anyone?
I had this question last time.
38. Why do you like them/why are you in love with them?
What?
39. Favorite cereal?
Waffle Crisp.
40. Name a movie that makes you cry.
The only movie I have almost shed a tear at in my adult life was "Star Trek Nemisis." POOR DATA
41. What's something you like about the opposite sex, physically, that your friends think is odd?
I like vibrant red hair and tons of freckles. I mean, lots of freckles.
42. Is it true that only the good die young?
YES IT IS A LAW OF THE UNIVERSE (who writes these quizzes?)
43. If so, are you going to live forever or die soon?
I am hoping that science will advance by the time I'm 50 to the point where I can live forever.
44. Do you live for today?
Sort of.
45. How fast can you run?
Not very fast.
46. Favorite band from the 60's/70's?
Don't make me decide! Is it King crimson?! Is it Gentle Giant?! Is it Steely Dan!? OMG WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME
47. Have any of your girl friends had kids as teenagers?
My brother had a kid when he was 18, his wife was 16.
48. Did they finish high school?
Yes.
49. Favorite 80's television show?
I don't know...
50. Were you even born in the 80's?
Yes!
51. What year?
1985 FOR LIVE! (we match, Katrina)
52. Have you ever taught a little kid a curse word?
No, but I have taught three little girls that George Washington and Abe Lincoln were actually giant wooden robots who've enslaved Canada.
53. If so which one was it?
jvlar!
54. Do you think little boys are horrendously ill behaved?
I really don't like kids much at all.
55. Have you ever thrown anything at a moving car?
I had a friend in elementary school who one night asked me if I wanted to "do dirt." I thought he was talking about drugs when in fact he was talking about causing mischief. We threw pinecones at cars, but I got scared and ran off. Needless to say, he's in jail now.
56. Name a villian in a movie that scared you when you were a kid.
Not really a villian, but Arnold Schwarzenegger when he got sucked out onto the surface of mars scared the shit out of me. Also, in that movie, the cab driver was horrifying.
57. Have you seen the original Friday the Thirteenth?
No.
58. The original Chucky?
Yes
59. The original Halloween?
No.
60. What's your favorite channel?
On television... Probably the History Channel.
61. What do you say when you stub your toe off of the corner of the coffee table?
Whoa I also say Aj faaaaan!! Not really. I don't know what I say.
62. What's the highest thing you've ever jumped off of and landed unharmed?
Four steps of stairs.
63. Does it snow where you live?
Not much.
64. If yes, do you go sled riding?
NOT APPLICABLE
65. Have you ever used anything weird like a frisbee or a trashcan lid for a sled?
I've used a trashcan lid
66. How many people do you know who were born in November?
One.
67. What month has the most people you know born in it?
February
68. Do holidays make you festive?
Not really. I am a bastard.
69. Magazines you subscribe to?
ZERO
70. Do you read the supermarket tabloids?
Nope
71. Have you ever smashed somebody's halloween pumpkin?
No
72. Ever had yours smashed?
Yes
73. Do you celebrate christmas?
I give gifts. I do not celebrate the birth of Jesus or the thievery of ancient pagan holidays.
74. Do you still watch "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" when it comes on television?
No. I never watch TV
75. Do you think the grinch movie starring jim carrey was a waste of money?
I don't care
76. Ever had a hot teacher?
No... But Tina Fey is hot.
77. If yes, did you flirt with him/her?
No
78. How do you treat people you are attracted to?
I don't know. Secretly sit very close to them, get any excuse to touch them, slit their throats.
79. What do you want for your birthday this year?
My birthday's already passed!
80. Have you ever egged somebody's house?
No
81. Has someone ever egged yours?
No
82. Do we all go a little mad sometimes?
HAHAHAHAHAH CALL ME CRAZY AGAIN AND I'LL BURN YOUR FAMILY
83. What pisses you off more than anything in the world?
Irrationality.
84. Do you still go trick or treating?
No
85. Do you believe in Santa Claus?
No
86. Have you ever worked in a supermarket?
No
87. How about a restaurant?
WENDY'S
88. If yes, do you agree with me when i say that those are the two worst establishments to work in?
Wendy's was pretty bad.
89. What color is your bedspread?
I have two: One is blue with suns and moons, the other is blue with Harry Potter on a Nimbus 2000.
90. Do your eyes change colors?
No, they stay consistently green.
91. Do you believe that we walked on the moon?
Yes
92. What's your opinion of the U.S. retaliation in Afghanistan?
THEY HATE FREEDOM
93. Do you live by yourself?
Sort of.
94. Have you ever gotten a computer virus?
95. If so, what was it and how did you get rid of it?
i don't wanna talk about it
96. Describe your junior high/middle school gym teacher.
I can't remember any of them... except for the molester guy who was always cussing. I never participated in gym.
97. How do you react when someone is talking to you, up in your face, and they have really bad breath?
I'm really sensitive to the way other people smell, and if that happens I typically back away. far away.
98. What was your first date like?
First date... Never had one.
99. Did you go to the prom?
No
100. If you went, was it good or bad?
-
101. Do you get uneasy when you see a person of a different color than you walking down the same street as you in the middle of the night?
The Dark Ones are taking over!
102. If yes, do you think that makes you racist?
Yes. Racism is pointless.
103. Are you a vegetarian?
No.
104. How about vegan?
haha no. BUT WHAT ABOUT THE BEES?!
105. If no to both, do you think you could be?
I could go vegetarian I guess. I'm sure I could -physically- go vegan, but I would ridicule myself too much.
106. Have you ever given up a certain type of food?
No.
107. Spit out a random song lyric for me. make sure you tell me the name of the song and who sings it!
"I do it backwards but I don't wake up
I do it reverse but I don't wake up
I sit and stride but I still don't wake up...
I took a cab there to hold her
I took a plane there to feel what she felt
You make me like charity
instead of paying enough taxes"
'You Make me Like Charity' - The Knife
108. Who does the chores around your house?
haha I don't know.
109. Name one person who annoys you more than anyone else, and tell why.
I don't know. I can't stand being yelled at by people.
110. What movie could you watch a million times and never get tired of?
Mel Brook's "Blazing Saddles" is pretty good. Star Wars.
111. What movie have you watched a million times, and you still laugh at the jokes?
Robin Hood - Men in Tights. Blazing Saddles. Mel Brooks WINZ
112. What movie do you hope you never see again?
Jurassic Park III. Horrorvision.com.
113. Have you ever hugged a stuffed animal or pillow and pretended that it was your significant other, or someone you had a crush on, and then someone caught you talking to it, and stroking its soft, fuzzy fur, and laughed at you and told the whole school?
wtf
114. Do you drive?
No
115. If so, do you like to drive at night or in the day time?
I take the bus
116. Has anyone ever called you a bitch?
OMG THAT SLUT CALLED ME A BITCH
117. Has anyone ever called you an asshole?
Yes
118. Are you a bitch or an asshole?
I don't think I'm either. But more of an asshole, I guess. (Is it so unreasonable to demand intelligence and rationality from people?!)
119. What's the first thing you do when you get home from work?
Usually- take off my pants.
120. Favorite pop tart flavor?
Brown Sugar + Maple.
121. Do you play any musical instruments?
I have spread my talentless musicianship across bass guitar, guitar, keyboards, accordian, and trombone.
122. Tell me about the best school-related activity you ever took part in.
Science Olympiad was pretty awesome.
123. Have you ever built a snowman?
Yes
124. Did you cry when it melted?
I took its head and put it in the freezer.
125. What's your religion?
I don't have a religion.
126. Do you try to force it on other people?
Sometimes I'd like people to see the error in their ways, but I never try to "convert" people to atheism.
127. Do you knock on people's doors at 7 a.m. on saturdays, trying to give them a pamphlet and tell them about the lord, or ask random people at the mall if theyve been saved, yet you think that doesnt count as forcing religion, you son of a bitch?
No.
128. What's the best restaurant you've ever eaten at?
Tuscany Grill. That crazy japanese place in Redmond, WA that Sean took me to.
129. Have you ever been flipping channels late at night and caught a glimpse of some porn on skinemax?
Yeah
130. If so, did you watch it?
No
131. What's the code word or phrase you and your friends use for the word SEX?
"Making Whoopee"
132. Is sex an uncomfortable topic for you?
No
133. What is the one thing in the world that just looking at it makes you vomit, or come close to it?
I'd have to go with puke.
134. When other people vomit, does it make you sick?
PUKE!
135. Do your clothes match?
I don't know
136. What are you wearing right now?
A red t-shirt that has the "Sharpie" logo on it. Blue underwear.
137. Did you ever have those fisher price roller skates that go over top of your shoes?
Yes
138. Did you have a bike with a banana seat?
No
139. Could you ride it?
-
140. Have you lived in the same house your entire life?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
141. What's the weirdest thing you've lived next to?
Disneyland.
142. Who is the ugliest person you've ever seen?
You!
143. Do you watch talk shows?
No.
144. Do you think miss cleo is full of shit?
Obviously.
145. If not, have you called her and wasted your money, you idiot?
-
146. What are your thoughts on keeping animals in captivity?
It depends. I don't want a rabid, crazed dog running around free.
147. What do you think of all the superstores that are popping up everywhere?
Whatever. They're convienient.
148. What do you think of pop music?
That's like asking "What do you think of breating all this oxygen in the air?" Pop music is nearly everything.
149. Tell me something I don't know.
Regicide - the murder of a king.
Yes, somewhere between 100-120 WPM
2. Does it annoy people who are around you (like in the library)?
I never use library computers... I don't know about my co-workers. But my home keyboard is rubbery and roll-up so it makes no noise when I type on it.
3. Did you like high school?
No.
4. How old are you?
21! OLD ENOUGH TO GO TO HOOTERS
5. Do you know anyone who has the same birthday as you?
No.
6. Favorite pen color?
I'll have to go with black.
7. What word do you constantly misspell when typing?
teh
8. Do you have trees in your yard?
I have a 1 bedroom apartment that costs me $800/month. I should have a yard.
9. Name one comedian that everyone thinks is funny but you absolutely cannot stand.
Wanda Sykes
10. Name one director you hate and tell why.
The guy who made "Gummo." All of his movies are pretty terrible. 'Kids' was okay.
11. Do you like Tim Burton?
Tim Burton's films are okay.
12. What annoys you more than anything?
The fact that I cannot make people rational and I have fleeting control over my own life.
13. Tell me about the weirdest pair of socks you own.
I have striped Hello Pirate Kitty knee-socks. Serious!
14. If you woke up tomorrow morning as the opposite sex, what would you do first?
GROSS WHY IS THERE A HOLE THERE
15. Did you read fear street books?
No, I read Goosebumps though.
16. How about Sweet Valley High?
No.
17. Babysitter's club? the Boxcar Children?
Nope.
18. Goosebumps?
YES
19. Favorite show on Nickelodeon?
What's on Nickelodeon these days?
20. Did you watch Are you Afraid of the Dark?
Yes
21. Did Zeebo the Clown scare you?
Yes
22. Where do you vacation every summer?
I don't really ever vacation.
23. Do you like the beach?
It's alright in small amounts.
24. Do you tan or burn easily?
I don't know... I'm never in the sun.
25. Do you make up your own words and lingo?
Yes!
26. Do you eat lots of TV dinners?
No
27. Favorite Hot Pocket flavor?
Turkey + Bacon + Cheese. I haven't had a hot pocket in forever!
28. If you could make one celebrity magically disappear, who would it be?
I can't really think of who infuriates me the most... Oprah is pretty annoying though. DID YOU KNOW SHE DOESN'T LIKE THINGS SOMETIMES?!?!?!?!
29. How is life treating you?
Eh. I have a pretty good job at least.
30. Do people like you?
I don't know.
31. What do you think it is that makes the "popular" people popular?
Typically because they were the most talkitive at school.
32. What do you wear the most: jeans, cords, dickies, khakis, skirts, or shorts?
Hmm... Slacks.
33. Are you using a PC or Mac?
PC! But I have two other PCs. And two Macs.
34. Do you like chunky peanut butter?
YES. I also have taken to eating giant bags of peanuts in the shell. It's delicious and entertaining!
35. What amazes you about the opposite sex?
WOMEN AREN'T MAGICAL
37. Do you like anyone?
I had this question last time.
38. Why do you like them/why are you in love with them?
What?
39. Favorite cereal?
Waffle Crisp.
40. Name a movie that makes you cry.
The only movie I have almost shed a tear at in my adult life was "Star Trek Nemisis." POOR DATA
41. What's something you like about the opposite sex, physically, that your friends think is odd?
I like vibrant red hair and tons of freckles. I mean, lots of freckles.
42. Is it true that only the good die young?
YES IT IS A LAW OF THE UNIVERSE (who writes these quizzes?)
43. If so, are you going to live forever or die soon?
I am hoping that science will advance by the time I'm 50 to the point where I can live forever.
44. Do you live for today?
Sort of.
45. How fast can you run?
Not very fast.
46. Favorite band from the 60's/70's?
Don't make me decide! Is it King crimson?! Is it Gentle Giant?! Is it Steely Dan!? OMG WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME
47. Have any of your girl friends had kids as teenagers?
My brother had a kid when he was 18, his wife was 16.
48. Did they finish high school?
Yes.
49. Favorite 80's television show?
I don't know...
50. Were you even born in the 80's?
Yes!
51. What year?
1985 FOR LIVE! (we match, Katrina)
52. Have you ever taught a little kid a curse word?
No, but I have taught three little girls that George Washington and Abe Lincoln were actually giant wooden robots who've enslaved Canada.
53. If so which one was it?
jvlar!
54. Do you think little boys are horrendously ill behaved?
I really don't like kids much at all.
55. Have you ever thrown anything at a moving car?
I had a friend in elementary school who one night asked me if I wanted to "do dirt." I thought he was talking about drugs when in fact he was talking about causing mischief. We threw pinecones at cars, but I got scared and ran off. Needless to say, he's in jail now.
56. Name a villian in a movie that scared you when you were a kid.
Not really a villian, but Arnold Schwarzenegger when he got sucked out onto the surface of mars scared the shit out of me. Also, in that movie, the cab driver was horrifying.
57. Have you seen the original Friday the Thirteenth?
No.
58. The original Chucky?
Yes
59. The original Halloween?
No.
60. What's your favorite channel?
On television... Probably the History Channel.
61. What do you say when you stub your toe off of the corner of the coffee table?
Whoa I also say Aj faaaaan!! Not really. I don't know what I say.
62. What's the highest thing you've ever jumped off of and landed unharmed?
Four steps of stairs.
63. Does it snow where you live?
Not much.
64. If yes, do you go sled riding?
NOT APPLICABLE
65. Have you ever used anything weird like a frisbee or a trashcan lid for a sled?
I've used a trashcan lid
66. How many people do you know who were born in November?
One.
67. What month has the most people you know born in it?
February
68. Do holidays make you festive?
Not really. I am a bastard.
69. Magazines you subscribe to?
ZERO
70. Do you read the supermarket tabloids?
Nope
71. Have you ever smashed somebody's halloween pumpkin?
No
72. Ever had yours smashed?
Yes
73. Do you celebrate christmas?
I give gifts. I do not celebrate the birth of Jesus or the thievery of ancient pagan holidays.
74. Do you still watch "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" when it comes on television?
No. I never watch TV
75. Do you think the grinch movie starring jim carrey was a waste of money?
I don't care
76. Ever had a hot teacher?
No... But Tina Fey is hot.
77. If yes, did you flirt with him/her?
No
78. How do you treat people you are attracted to?
I don't know. Secretly sit very close to them, get any excuse to touch them, slit their throats.
79. What do you want for your birthday this year?
My birthday's already passed!
80. Have you ever egged somebody's house?
No
81. Has someone ever egged yours?
No
82. Do we all go a little mad sometimes?
HAHAHAHAHAH CALL ME CRAZY AGAIN AND I'LL BURN YOUR FAMILY
83. What pisses you off more than anything in the world?
Irrationality.
84. Do you still go trick or treating?
No
85. Do you believe in Santa Claus?
No
86. Have you ever worked in a supermarket?
No
87. How about a restaurant?
WENDY'S
88. If yes, do you agree with me when i say that those are the two worst establishments to work in?
Wendy's was pretty bad.
89. What color is your bedspread?
I have two: One is blue with suns and moons, the other is blue with Harry Potter on a Nimbus 2000.
90. Do your eyes change colors?
No, they stay consistently green.
91. Do you believe that we walked on the moon?
Yes
92. What's your opinion of the U.S. retaliation in Afghanistan?
THEY HATE FREEDOM
93. Do you live by yourself?
Sort of.
94. Have you ever gotten a computer virus?
95. If so, what was it and how did you get rid of it?
i don't wanna talk about it
96. Describe your junior high/middle school gym teacher.
I can't remember any of them... except for the molester guy who was always cussing. I never participated in gym.
97. How do you react when someone is talking to you, up in your face, and they have really bad breath?
I'm really sensitive to the way other people smell, and if that happens I typically back away. far away.
98. What was your first date like?
First date... Never had one.
99. Did you go to the prom?
No
100. If you went, was it good or bad?
-
101. Do you get uneasy when you see a person of a different color than you walking down the same street as you in the middle of the night?
The Dark Ones are taking over!
102. If yes, do you think that makes you racist?
Yes. Racism is pointless.
103. Are you a vegetarian?
No.
104. How about vegan?
haha no. BUT WHAT ABOUT THE BEES?!
105. If no to both, do you think you could be?
I could go vegetarian I guess. I'm sure I could -physically- go vegan, but I would ridicule myself too much.
106. Have you ever given up a certain type of food?
No.
107. Spit out a random song lyric for me. make sure you tell me the name of the song and who sings it!
"I do it backwards but I don't wake up
I do it reverse but I don't wake up
I sit and stride but I still don't wake up...
I took a cab there to hold her
I took a plane there to feel what she felt
You make me like charity
instead of paying enough taxes"
'You Make me Like Charity' - The Knife
108. Who does the chores around your house?
haha I don't know.
109. Name one person who annoys you more than anyone else, and tell why.
I don't know. I can't stand being yelled at by people.
110. What movie could you watch a million times and never get tired of?
Mel Brook's "Blazing Saddles" is pretty good. Star Wars.
111. What movie have you watched a million times, and you still laugh at the jokes?
Robin Hood - Men in Tights. Blazing Saddles. Mel Brooks WINZ
112. What movie do you hope you never see again?
Jurassic Park III. Horrorvision.com.
113. Have you ever hugged a stuffed animal or pillow and pretended that it was your significant other, or someone you had a crush on, and then someone caught you talking to it, and stroking its soft, fuzzy fur, and laughed at you and told the whole school?
wtf
114. Do you drive?
No
115. If so, do you like to drive at night or in the day time?
I take the bus
116. Has anyone ever called you a bitch?
OMG THAT SLUT CALLED ME A BITCH
117. Has anyone ever called you an asshole?
Yes
118. Are you a bitch or an asshole?
I don't think I'm either. But more of an asshole, I guess. (Is it so unreasonable to demand intelligence and rationality from people?!)
119. What's the first thing you do when you get home from work?
Usually- take off my pants.
120. Favorite pop tart flavor?
Brown Sugar + Maple.
121. Do you play any musical instruments?
I have spread my talentless musicianship across bass guitar, guitar, keyboards, accordian, and trombone.
122. Tell me about the best school-related activity you ever took part in.
Science Olympiad was pretty awesome.
123. Have you ever built a snowman?
Yes
124. Did you cry when it melted?
I took its head and put it in the freezer.
125. What's your religion?
I don't have a religion.
126. Do you try to force it on other people?
Sometimes I'd like people to see the error in their ways, but I never try to "convert" people to atheism.
127. Do you knock on people's doors at 7 a.m. on saturdays, trying to give them a pamphlet and tell them about the lord, or ask random people at the mall if theyve been saved, yet you think that doesnt count as forcing religion, you son of a bitch?
No.
128. What's the best restaurant you've ever eaten at?
Tuscany Grill. That crazy japanese place in Redmond, WA that Sean took me to.
129. Have you ever been flipping channels late at night and caught a glimpse of some porn on skinemax?
Yeah
130. If so, did you watch it?
No
131. What's the code word or phrase you and your friends use for the word SEX?
"Making Whoopee"
132. Is sex an uncomfortable topic for you?
No
133. What is the one thing in the world that just looking at it makes you vomit, or come close to it?
I'd have to go with puke.
134. When other people vomit, does it make you sick?
PUKE!
135. Do your clothes match?
I don't know
136. What are you wearing right now?
A red t-shirt that has the "Sharpie" logo on it. Blue underwear.
137. Did you ever have those fisher price roller skates that go over top of your shoes?
Yes
138. Did you have a bike with a banana seat?
No
139. Could you ride it?
-
140. Have you lived in the same house your entire life?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
141. What's the weirdest thing you've lived next to?
Disneyland.
142. Who is the ugliest person you've ever seen?
You!
143. Do you watch talk shows?
No.
144. Do you think miss cleo is full of shit?
Obviously.
145. If not, have you called her and wasted your money, you idiot?
-
146. What are your thoughts on keeping animals in captivity?
It depends. I don't want a rabid, crazed dog running around free.
147. What do you think of all the superstores that are popping up everywhere?
Whatever. They're convienient.
148. What do you think of pop music?
That's like asking "What do you think of breating all this oxygen in the air?" Pop music is nearly everything.
149. Tell me something I don't know.
Regicide - the murder of a king.
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