Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

quijybo

Member Since 2002

Followers 2 Following 5

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Monday Aug 11, 2003

Aug 11, 2003
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
i'm really depressed today, and i'm not sure if it is because my grandfather died.
i don't want to leave the house. i have work in 3 hours. i really just want to stay home and cuddle with the boy.
tomorrow he's being a sweetie and is driving to altoona with me for the viewing. wednesday is the funeral, and then i'm off to harrisburg for a few days.
this may seem awful to say about a dead person, but... i have no idea why this is affecting me so much. my grandfather was an awful selfish person that abused my mom.
i think maybe it hurts me because i know that in my lifetime there is never any chance of me having a loving typical grandpa/granddaughter relationship. also, with this death, i have absolutely no grandparents alive.
i really wish there had been some love there. i'm not going to con myself and think that he loved me either.
we barely ever spoke, and that sucks.
atleast i can take solice in that fact that my parents are very loving, and so my kids will have a good grandparents experience.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
max16characters:
Believe me i understand...my grandfather was pretty much an asshole too. When he died, i felt bad and sad, but not because i missed his love. It was because he was never there as a typical grandfather and i never got to know the man who fathere my mom. I don't know if that's similar to how you feel on it or not but it sounds like you're in the same boat as i was when it happened.

On a side note...you know you get bereavement time at Starbucks for deaths in the family right? If not, you might want to check into that one.
Aug 11, 2003
rickroyal:
Yowch. I think a cuddle with the boy is desperately needed. Good thoughts are directed your way as well.

My paternal grandmother died last October. It was strange because it was almost like a stranger dying. I rarely saw her, never really thought about her, and had absolutely no emotions invested in her. Completely different from your own situation, but it reminded me of it.
Aug 12, 2003

More Blogs

  • 01.21.04
    12

    Wednesday Jan 21, 2004

    ok. this is kinda weird, but i think the new sg danika kinda looks li…
  • 01.19.04
    2

    Monday Jan 19, 2004

    random random random so, i'm definitely giving my account away. i…
  • 01.09.04
    0

    Saturday Jan 10, 2004

    irony. my favorite shakespearian soliloquy. it is from hamlet. "I h…
  • 01.05.04
    9

    Monday Jan 05, 2004

    i'm feeling oddly motivated right now. WATCH OUT! this must mean som…
  • 01.04.04
    1

    Sunday Jan 04, 2004

    a while ago i queried you people about the possibility of having too …
  • 01.02.04
    1

    Saturday Jan 03, 2004

    new profile pic taken last night at my friend's bday. it's blurry, b…
  • 12.21.03
    2

    Monday Dec 22, 2003

    the boy and i tried magnum sized condoms last night, and they fit him…
  • 12.21.03
    1

    Sunday Dec 21, 2003

    things have been crazy the past few days. i haven't had time to look…
  • 12.16.03
    1

    Tuesday Dec 16, 2003

    someone broke into my boyfriend's apartment today and stole his video…
  • 12.09.03
    9

    Tuesday Dec 09, 2003

    i've been meeting a lot of new people lately. this is definitely a t…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
10
months
4
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,597 SuicideGirls
  • 1,114,979 followers
  • 14,936,349 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,433,611 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo