preppylegend

Ive realized why i love where i live tonight, it has huge comedy value . The place i stay is a total mix of the hugely successful and downtrodden poor thanks to the leith regeneration boom.
Here is an example .

The scene is in victoria wine , a upmarket-ish off license franchise .For the foreign sorts a nectar card is a supermarket saver card which entitles you to point in which to purchase air miles , petrol etc.


Retail assistant ( probably a law student ) : " can i help you sir "

Tramp( who just happens to smell of stale urine): "Two bottles of white and macky and 40 bensons, doll"

Retail assistant " do you have a nectar card "

Tramp " a whaaaat "

Retail assistant " a nectar card , do you have one "

Tramp "are you fuckin bevied( this means drunk in scottish ) or sumin "

Retail assistant " am i what , im sorry i didnt catch that "

Tramp " bevied you ken like ....naa you hen ( lady ) you cunt "

Retail assistant " would you like anything else sir"

Tramp" I , i'll have a bottle of gin and all "

Retail assistant " would you like some tonic with that "

Tramp " oh... ( hesitates for a second almost as if to come up with something very profound) ,,,,, oh FUCK OFF"

Priceless




BTW looking forward to meet tomorrow , should be fun . Pity some cant make it , you know who you are