These are some short letters I've been meaning to write:
Dear the show House,
Please stop being so intense, you have no right to be. If you do not cease and desist I will be forced to continue watching episodes and stop all work on my thesis.
Ian
Dear Lou Ferrigno,
When you played the Hulk on TV, why did you wear green water socks? Were your feet too ticklish to paint green?
Ian
Dear Dark Matter,
Now that I know for sure how the universe is going to end I find it hard to justify getting angry at people who cut me off in traffic. Thanks a lot.
Ian
Dear Ryan North,
I've been seeing another cartoonist on the side. His name is Randall Munroe, yeah, you introduced us. I- I'm sorry. I hope this doesn't change things between us.
Ian
Dear Senator Voldemort (Ted Stevens),
I'm sending you an internet. I hope it doesn't take 3 days to get to you. Some times they get clogged in the tubes.
lol, internet
Ian
Dear cowboys,
Where have you all gone?
Ian
PS: Don't come back.
Dear Arrested Development's cast,
I miss you all so very much. I mean, I'm glad you're all getting jobs and moving on with your careers but... I'm just feeling a little blue is all.
Ian
Dear radioactive spiders,
C'mon you guys. I'm RIGHT HERE! I promise I taste good.
Ian
Dear Danger Mouse,
HIGH FIVE! You totally stuck it to Paris Hilton dude! WHOOO!
Ian
Dear friends,
Thanks for rocking so fucking hard you make Dragon Force look like Kidz Bop 10. You make Andrew WK look like Enya. My friends, amidst this world of ass hats and general dickotry, you guys are the pillars of strength that remind me to keep my chin up and chest out (how else am I gonna get the guys to look at me ^_~). You guys are like buoys in a sea of douche, thank you. Sorry... that was kinda gross.
Ian
Dear the show House,
Please stop being so intense, you have no right to be. If you do not cease and desist I will be forced to continue watching episodes and stop all work on my thesis.
Ian
Dear Lou Ferrigno,
When you played the Hulk on TV, why did you wear green water socks? Were your feet too ticklish to paint green?
Ian
Dear Dark Matter,
Now that I know for sure how the universe is going to end I find it hard to justify getting angry at people who cut me off in traffic. Thanks a lot.
Ian
Dear Ryan North,
I've been seeing another cartoonist on the side. His name is Randall Munroe, yeah, you introduced us. I- I'm sorry. I hope this doesn't change things between us.
Ian
Dear Senator Voldemort (Ted Stevens),
I'm sending you an internet. I hope it doesn't take 3 days to get to you. Some times they get clogged in the tubes.
lol, internet
Ian
Dear cowboys,
Where have you all gone?
Ian
PS: Don't come back.
Dear Arrested Development's cast,
I miss you all so very much. I mean, I'm glad you're all getting jobs and moving on with your careers but... I'm just feeling a little blue is all.
Ian
Dear radioactive spiders,
C'mon you guys. I'm RIGHT HERE! I promise I taste good.
Ian
Dear Danger Mouse,
HIGH FIVE! You totally stuck it to Paris Hilton dude! WHOOO!
Ian
Dear friends,
Thanks for rocking so fucking hard you make Dragon Force look like Kidz Bop 10. You make Andrew WK look like Enya. My friends, amidst this world of ass hats and general dickotry, you guys are the pillars of strength that remind me to keep my chin up and chest out (how else am I gonna get the guys to look at me ^_~). You guys are like buoys in a sea of douche, thank you. Sorry... that was kinda gross.
Ian
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
So you feel like the love child of Sephiroth and circa 1980's Prince? ^_^
don't know what the situation on this girl is, but she better show up otherwise "accidents" will be arranged for her.
(Note: In case she doesn't show up and dies in some kind of freak accident, I had NOTHING to do with it.)
Indeed, haven't you ever felt like that sometimes especially when you're out at the bar after acouple rounds Screwdrivers and Afterburners.
Good thing she did because I was thinking the same thing bro