Hung Like a Duck
I'm not, even. I give up. I know when I'm beat. Mom, come take me home. I just can't compete.
A question came up the other day: does Daisy Duck have a vagina? When asked, I didn't bother to say that most birds have a single orifice (male AND female), which shares all sorts of duties and that the genitals are usually internal. No, I looked at it from a different angle. Would a snarky old curmudgeon like Donald stay with Daisy for long if she didn't have a vagina? Well, maybe, if he didn't have a penis. After all, they never had kids - only nephews.
And then I did a Google image search for "duck sex".
No, it wasn't that bad. As far as I can see, pictures of ducks having sex are usually just pictures of male ducks looking for all the world like they're swimming normally. The only difference is that there is a female ducks's head poking out of the water in front of them, looking a little frantic.
But I did come across an article on the National Geographic website that's very interesting. It's about two oddities in the animal kingdom: the chameleon's tongue and the duck's dick. Specifically, the enormous penis of the Angentine Lake Duck.
"The Argentine lake duck is small, weighing a little more than a pound (640 grams) and extending about 16 inches (41 centimeters) long from head to tail... The Argentine lake duck is a stiff-tail duck; its tail feathers spike upward and its legs are set far back on its body. The bird is extremely clumsy on land and spends most of its time in the water."
Aww.... cute! But tell us about it's cock, please!
"Researchers discovered that the penis , when fully extended, measures about 17 inches (0.5 meters) long. When not in use, the corkscrew-shaped penis retracts into the duck's abdomen. The trait is one that bears further study, say the researchers."
17 inches, for the record, is one more inch than 16 inches. So I guess you could say that the Angentine Lake Duck is 16 inches long, but 17 inches long when its penis is fully extended!
And for those of you who are into bondage:
"Our best guess is that the birds use [the long penis] as a kind of lasso. The males have to chase the females, and even during copulation the females are trying to escape."
I used to love ducks because the look funny and sound even funnier. Little did I know that some of them are packing prick that makes John Holmes look like he had a third pinky! Not to mention corkscrewy and retractable...
I'm not, even. I give up. I know when I'm beat. Mom, come take me home. I just can't compete.
A question came up the other day: does Daisy Duck have a vagina? When asked, I didn't bother to say that most birds have a single orifice (male AND female), which shares all sorts of duties and that the genitals are usually internal. No, I looked at it from a different angle. Would a snarky old curmudgeon like Donald stay with Daisy for long if she didn't have a vagina? Well, maybe, if he didn't have a penis. After all, they never had kids - only nephews.
And then I did a Google image search for "duck sex".
No, it wasn't that bad. As far as I can see, pictures of ducks having sex are usually just pictures of male ducks looking for all the world like they're swimming normally. The only difference is that there is a female ducks's head poking out of the water in front of them, looking a little frantic.
But I did come across an article on the National Geographic website that's very interesting. It's about two oddities in the animal kingdom: the chameleon's tongue and the duck's dick. Specifically, the enormous penis of the Angentine Lake Duck.
"The Argentine lake duck is small, weighing a little more than a pound (640 grams) and extending about 16 inches (41 centimeters) long from head to tail... The Argentine lake duck is a stiff-tail duck; its tail feathers spike upward and its legs are set far back on its body. The bird is extremely clumsy on land and spends most of its time in the water."
Aww.... cute! But tell us about it's cock, please!
"Researchers discovered that the penis , when fully extended, measures about 17 inches (0.5 meters) long. When not in use, the corkscrew-shaped penis retracts into the duck's abdomen. The trait is one that bears further study, say the researchers."
17 inches, for the record, is one more inch than 16 inches. So I guess you could say that the Angentine Lake Duck is 16 inches long, but 17 inches long when its penis is fully extended!
And for those of you who are into bondage:
"Our best guess is that the birds use [the long penis] as a kind of lasso. The males have to chase the females, and even during copulation the females are trying to escape."
I used to love ducks because the look funny and sound even funnier. Little did I know that some of them are packing prick that makes John Holmes look like he had a third pinky! Not to mention corkscrewy and retractable...
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
yes, I was scared.... perhaps only I knew how inebriated I was...
hmm. locked inside the prison of my own realization of how much I wished I was sober... perhaps I could have just wung it.
thanks though... for saying you didn't notice.