I've been trying to write a new piece of fiction for ages now but eveything I tried didn't quite fit. So I decided to use myself as the starting point...
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
The Quiet Things No One Else Knows
Sometimes I just want to go back to the bed, fall asleep, wake up and start the day over again
I have pretend arguments with the people I love in my head and I don't know why
I want to live in New York for a year
I wish I paid more attention in school
I wish the bullies let me pay more attention in school
At the age of 27, I have never fallen in love with anyone and it breaks my heart every time I think about it
I have plans for 3 tattoos but I'm too scared of my mother to get them
If I could live at a music festival all round, I would be a very happy bunny
When I go to see bands play, I just want to be left alone to soak it all up and not have to anyone/thing on my mind
Sometimes I want to be a moody, bitchy cow, but most of the time, I'm too polite
I love Elvis, seriously
I have no sense of style or fashion. If I look like I planned my outfit, I haven't. It's all just a lucky coincidence
I want to be a writer but I'm too caught up in self-pretentiousness to write anything
I wish I was thinner, taller and prettier
I'm very selfish
I'm crap with money
I'm scared I'll settle for the next guy that comes along because I'm fed up waiting for nearly 10 years for "the One"
Sometimes I feel so empty and have no idea how to cure it
I love Dave Grohl for his mind, not just for his body
I get really upset if someone forgets my birthday, but I try not to show it as I don't want to seen as a spoilt brat
When I was little, I hated my parents for not giving me any brothers or sisters, although I now know that if they did, I would've probably hated sharing with the siblings anyway
I don't understand why some people with question my taste in music. Yes I do love rock/punk/metal/emo music, why is that so hard to comprehend?
If I ever shrug my shoulders and say "that's OK, I don't mind", it usually means I do mind and it's not OK, OK?
I wish I had someone to go home to who will wrap me up in his arms and tell me something, anything, that will make me feel better about the crap day I just had
I try to remember as many little things as possible because I think when it all comes down, it'll be the little things that matter
I'm scared I'm going to lose my mind to Alzheimer's, like my Grandma
I want to be a scary cat lady when I grow up, with a minimum of 15 cats to do my evil bidding
I've gotten so good at hiding my dark thoughts, they scare me when they re-surface
I don't take care of myself as well as I should
I want to be a killer bass player, but I get frustrated with how crap I am every time I pick my guitar
I've read this back to myself and I'm now wishing I wasn't so fucking negative! I have a lot to be thankful for, even though this list doesn't show that
Let me know what you think of my diatribe because I'm not sure what to think anymore! I'm off to see Jimmy Eat World now, see if that shakes off this strangeness out of my head!! xxx