*sigh*
Who knew life could be so complicated? I really just don't know what is going on in my life anymore. I mean......I'm happy one minute, sad the next....I think I'm secure in my relationship and the next I'm wondering whether I have made the right choices in the past. It's really fucking annoying. I think maybe I'm just crazy. See this is how it all went down: Friday night I went out with my family and Tricky's family to celebrate my birthday. I was nervous at first cuz I wanted our families to get along....and they did, which is good. On Saturday I went to Lucy's birthday party with Tricky and abadinfluence and we picked up Aeres and her boyfriend. And that was good. Sunday I woke up early and went to Niagara Falls with Tricky and my family. And see....normally that would be good right? But on Sunday nite I was so confused about life. I don't know if I was weirded out because my family gets along so well with Tricky and that I'm scared that this is going to get fucked up too somehow. Or if it's something else? On Saturday I was in a weird mood because I found out that my ex has been hanging out with a "friend" of his lately. And this girl is drop dead gorgeous......and so now that HE might be getting into a new relationship that really freaks me out. I'm weird like that. I mean its okay if I'M the one in a new relationship....but now that HE might be in one........that just doesn't sit right with me. *sigh* I think I just need to check myself into a mental institution or something.....maybe they can fix me. I just don't know what I want with my life anymore. All the things I thought I wanted turned out to be wrong. And see I really don't understand myself half the time so then I don't understand why ANYONE would want to be with me.....I'm a moody moody little girl. If I don't like myself....how can anyone else? These are the things that I need answers to before I can be sane. I sit awake all the time now......wondering if my life is going to be okay.....and I know there are lots of people out there who have things WAY worse than I do......but it still bugs me ya know?
So ya. Crazy crazy me. Although really I'm only REALLY crazy about 80% of the time. Other times I feel like I have my life in order.....but then in the blink of an eye.....I'm a nut again. So watch out! Don't say I didn't warn ya
Who knew life could be so complicated? I really just don't know what is going on in my life anymore. I mean......I'm happy one minute, sad the next....I think I'm secure in my relationship and the next I'm wondering whether I have made the right choices in the past. It's really fucking annoying. I think maybe I'm just crazy. See this is how it all went down: Friday night I went out with my family and Tricky's family to celebrate my birthday. I was nervous at first cuz I wanted our families to get along....and they did, which is good. On Saturday I went to Lucy's birthday party with Tricky and abadinfluence and we picked up Aeres and her boyfriend. And that was good. Sunday I woke up early and went to Niagara Falls with Tricky and my family. And see....normally that would be good right? But on Sunday nite I was so confused about life. I don't know if I was weirded out because my family gets along so well with Tricky and that I'm scared that this is going to get fucked up too somehow. Or if it's something else? On Saturday I was in a weird mood because I found out that my ex has been hanging out with a "friend" of his lately. And this girl is drop dead gorgeous......and so now that HE might be getting into a new relationship that really freaks me out. I'm weird like that. I mean its okay if I'M the one in a new relationship....but now that HE might be in one........that just doesn't sit right with me. *sigh* I think I just need to check myself into a mental institution or something.....maybe they can fix me. I just don't know what I want with my life anymore. All the things I thought I wanted turned out to be wrong. And see I really don't understand myself half the time so then I don't understand why ANYONE would want to be with me.....I'm a moody moody little girl. If I don't like myself....how can anyone else? These are the things that I need answers to before I can be sane. I sit awake all the time now......wondering if my life is going to be okay.....and I know there are lots of people out there who have things WAY worse than I do......but it still bugs me ya know?
So ya. Crazy crazy me. Although really I'm only REALLY crazy about 80% of the time. Other times I feel like I have my life in order.....but then in the blink of an eye.....I'm a nut again. So watch out! Don't say I didn't warn ya
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just take good care of yourself