I've known this guy for almost 20 years. We started working together at the same bar back in Cowtown in 1987 or so, and we've basically been hanging out ever since.
In the last 3 months, things have gotten pretty strained between us for some reason. He's said some pretty strange shit to me... He was the one that asked me if I wanted to know what "she was up to". He was the one that wouldn't stop telling me about who she was seeing even after I said that no, I didn't wanna know.
I emailed him 2 weeks ago after the Gimpster died, and was surprised to not hear anything back from him on that. I emailed him again 3 days ago with a short "dude, what's up?" type email. Still didn't hear anything.
So finally, I've sent this off to him.
________________________________
Yo.
Dude, where are you?
Hey man, something is obviously going on here between us, but I just have to say that no matter what, no matter how fuckin weird you got, if I thought you needed some help, Id stick by your side.
If you started looking at things all fucked up like, Id stick by your side.
Im not trying to pull at your heartstrings here, but I quite seriously have nobody in my life.
If you think that I have been doing things or viewing things that dont mesh with your view of the world, lets hash it out, talk to me about it.
Dont drop me to the curb dude, absolutely everybody else already has.
(Well, except for the old 'best friend there' , that was my doing.)
My cell phone fried yesterday. Were waiting for the rep to come and replace it tomorrow, so I am phoneless for now. But no matter what selective portrayal you have received from her, I cant accept that you would have it in you to think I was so unworthy of your support.
Talk to me man, Im turning into a fuckin astronaut over here.
_____________________________________
man, that is so guy.
Guy I said. GUY.
Actually I think what's happening here is this particular dude is going through some of his own shit with this. He went through what turned out to be a bit of a nasty divorce about 8 years ago, and I'll never forget the first time I went out for drinks with him after I broke up with the Robynator.
3 months ago, I was feeling pretty fuckin sad, it had been about 3 or 4 weeks since I'd seen her. He and I and finally found some time and met up at the Railway after work one day. We sat down, and I started to talk about the shit I was going through, and he chimed in with his own experience after his ex wife left the country. That's when it got strange. It was almost like that's all he had to do to open up the floodgates that had obviously been closed for a VERY long time, because for the next 45 minutes, I was the ear for him as he went off about his fucking ex.
Oh My GOD that guy has some serious anger issues over that, some seriously unresolved issues over that. 8 years and he was still pretty livid. Anyways, he had to run to catch a train, and I was left sitting there kinda in shock, like
"well, I hope you feel better, nice er.. talking to you."
Him and his current GF took her out for a birthday dinner, and I know that they are in fairly constant contact with her. I talked to him on the phone a few times over the next couple of months, and every now and then I would say something that would really seem to piss him off. Usually to do with my vision of how things could be better in the world if people would just treat eachother with compassion. Ysee, back then I was mostly upset by how she was so angry and disrespectful towards me, I was trying to get my point across that if there was two ways of approaching a situation like this, one being with hostility and disrespect, the other being with compassion and respect, look at the 3 possibilities.
1. both people act towards eachother with hostility and disrespect. = bad outcome.
2. one person acts with hostility and disrespect, the other with compassion and respect. = still a bad outcome, but not quite as bad as option #1
3. both people act towards eachother with compassion and respect. = everybody's happy... ok, well maybe not 'happy', but certainly moving towards it properly.
He got a little pissed off at me for being so dead set on that thought. He started to say something along the lines of
Most people, when they are going through a breakup tend to just try to forget that the other person even exists
I cut him off though,
Dude, every time a sentence starts with the words Most people, the rest of the sentence is irrelevant to me because most people suck. Im not interested in what most people would do or are doing, I want to do whats right, and I am just hoping that she would see that and try the same.
Nope. Hed have none of that.
Then it dawned on me.
His ex wife and I are still quite close, well as close as you can be when you live on opposite sides of the world, but when she is in town, I have a very close feeling for her. I do believe that her and I share a lot of the same beliefs in personal relations, and I would bet that some of my words have echoed hers. My friend here though, his views are a lot like Robyns, and I can see now in hindsight that he reacted to his own breakup a lot like Robyn is acting in this one.
Oh my god, Im his ex to him. He is fucking reliving his own nasty breakup through this thing, and I have become symbolic of his ex, as he aligns himself with Robyn. Thats why I saw the glint in his eye that night at the Railway when he wouldnt stop telling me about Robyn seeing that big black guy, it would explain that bizarre comment he made that night as well: shes winning.
He has been stabbing at his ex.
In the last 3 months, things have gotten pretty strained between us for some reason. He's said some pretty strange shit to me... He was the one that asked me if I wanted to know what "she was up to". He was the one that wouldn't stop telling me about who she was seeing even after I said that no, I didn't wanna know.
I emailed him 2 weeks ago after the Gimpster died, and was surprised to not hear anything back from him on that. I emailed him again 3 days ago with a short "dude, what's up?" type email. Still didn't hear anything.
So finally, I've sent this off to him.
________________________________
Yo.
Dude, where are you?
Hey man, something is obviously going on here between us, but I just have to say that no matter what, no matter how fuckin weird you got, if I thought you needed some help, Id stick by your side.
If you started looking at things all fucked up like, Id stick by your side.
Im not trying to pull at your heartstrings here, but I quite seriously have nobody in my life.
If you think that I have been doing things or viewing things that dont mesh with your view of the world, lets hash it out, talk to me about it.
Dont drop me to the curb dude, absolutely everybody else already has.
(Well, except for the old 'best friend there' , that was my doing.)
My cell phone fried yesterday. Were waiting for the rep to come and replace it tomorrow, so I am phoneless for now. But no matter what selective portrayal you have received from her, I cant accept that you would have it in you to think I was so unworthy of your support.
Talk to me man, Im turning into a fuckin astronaut over here.
_____________________________________
man, that is so guy.
Guy I said. GUY.
Actually I think what's happening here is this particular dude is going through some of his own shit with this. He went through what turned out to be a bit of a nasty divorce about 8 years ago, and I'll never forget the first time I went out for drinks with him after I broke up with the Robynator.
3 months ago, I was feeling pretty fuckin sad, it had been about 3 or 4 weeks since I'd seen her. He and I and finally found some time and met up at the Railway after work one day. We sat down, and I started to talk about the shit I was going through, and he chimed in with his own experience after his ex wife left the country. That's when it got strange. It was almost like that's all he had to do to open up the floodgates that had obviously been closed for a VERY long time, because for the next 45 minutes, I was the ear for him as he went off about his fucking ex.
Oh My GOD that guy has some serious anger issues over that, some seriously unresolved issues over that. 8 years and he was still pretty livid. Anyways, he had to run to catch a train, and I was left sitting there kinda in shock, like
"well, I hope you feel better, nice er.. talking to you."
Him and his current GF took her out for a birthday dinner, and I know that they are in fairly constant contact with her. I talked to him on the phone a few times over the next couple of months, and every now and then I would say something that would really seem to piss him off. Usually to do with my vision of how things could be better in the world if people would just treat eachother with compassion. Ysee, back then I was mostly upset by how she was so angry and disrespectful towards me, I was trying to get my point across that if there was two ways of approaching a situation like this, one being with hostility and disrespect, the other being with compassion and respect, look at the 3 possibilities.
1. both people act towards eachother with hostility and disrespect. = bad outcome.
2. one person acts with hostility and disrespect, the other with compassion and respect. = still a bad outcome, but not quite as bad as option #1
3. both people act towards eachother with compassion and respect. = everybody's happy... ok, well maybe not 'happy', but certainly moving towards it properly.
He got a little pissed off at me for being so dead set on that thought. He started to say something along the lines of
Most people, when they are going through a breakup tend to just try to forget that the other person even exists
I cut him off though,
Dude, every time a sentence starts with the words Most people, the rest of the sentence is irrelevant to me because most people suck. Im not interested in what most people would do or are doing, I want to do whats right, and I am just hoping that she would see that and try the same.
Nope. Hed have none of that.
Then it dawned on me.
His ex wife and I are still quite close, well as close as you can be when you live on opposite sides of the world, but when she is in town, I have a very close feeling for her. I do believe that her and I share a lot of the same beliefs in personal relations, and I would bet that some of my words have echoed hers. My friend here though, his views are a lot like Robyns, and I can see now in hindsight that he reacted to his own breakup a lot like Robyn is acting in this one.
Oh my god, Im his ex to him. He is fucking reliving his own nasty breakup through this thing, and I have become symbolic of his ex, as he aligns himself with Robyn. Thats why I saw the glint in his eye that night at the Railway when he wouldnt stop telling me about Robyn seeing that big black guy, it would explain that bizarre comment he made that night as well: shes winning.
He has been stabbing at his ex.
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There's some pics in the hubbys folders.