Love, life, and the things we do to fuck with them...
So I suppose it would come to no surprise to anyone who's read at least 2 of my ridiculous blogs, but I like to write about my interactions with the opposite sex. Maybe it is a way for me to sound dark and brooding, or maybe I like self mastication, but before I begin this week's post, let me assure any readers that this is done in no way to make myself look good. Quite the contrary, I keep hoping someone will comment on one of these and call me on my bullshit. Or maybe I am just a narcissist. Onto the continuation of my probably entirely misguided assumptions.
This week I thought I would ask a few different questions. I've discussed location of women, and how that will change the types you will meet (much as I am against typecasting in general), as well as evolution of sexual fantasies. The hell bent need women sometimes seem to have to be in love. And god knows I've got other blogs on my myspace that were written long ago about similar topics and probably make even less sense than the ones I have posted now.
I would now like to touch on the topic of the games people play, as well as the things people THINK are games, but are actually true. They say that an average of half the things people say in jokes they actually mean, however phrasing whatever they are saying in a joke allows them to stay safe and gauge reactions. This makes perfect sense, and for those of you who might need an example, well, here you go:
Guy: "Wouldn't it be funny if your sister had a crush on me."
What he's really trying to say: "God I hope your sister has a crush on me."
Now that you know exactly what I'm saying, I can continue. Why do we go through all of this nonsense? Have we really gotten so sensitive as a society that we are constantly afraid to say what we are thinking or feeling? Why can't "Guy" just say he digs "Girl's" sister? Sure it might sting, and certainly it will make her angry. But let's for a second ignore the obvious; What if her sister was truly this guy's soulmate? Sister, best friend, roommate, whatever the case may be, do any of us really have the right to say that two people have no business being together? If there is one thing I am realizing after a love life full of "shoulda, woulda, coulda, but didn't" and all around bad timing, wrong friend, wrong sister, wrong party, wrong break up bullshit, it is that there aren't as many people in this world as we'd like to think.
Sit for a second and really analyze how often you meet new people. Now make a couple categories. Friends, Idiots, potential Lovers. I guarantee you that one of those columns will receive the majority. Now amongst that list, lets look at potential lovers. How many of them will you ever see again? How many will you see for a long time? And how many of them will eventually make their way into one of the other two columns. That's the interesting thing about love, isn't it? Someone can start in the Potential Lover category, and later be moved into Idiots or Friends. The same is not true of people that start in the Friend or Idiot category,
Now how many of us live near cities? We have a leg up, the pool from which we can meet new people is far larger than for others. So barring that, or hell, including that even, should we really be narrowing the field for each other? The amount of people with which we can conceivably form real connections with is limited to start with, simply by the sheer amount of personalities which we all possess. Sure, we can have a few exceptions, if I was truly in love with a woman then my friends and family should stay away from them, but if I had a couple weeks of fun with a woman and called it quits early, I have no intention of saying they are off limits. I've dated over 20 women, I've truly loved 2, that leaves 18+ entirely viable options which I would wish my friends the best of luck with. We need to stop getting in each other's way.
Futhermore, we need to start saying what we are thinking. If I meet a girl and I am interested, I have to be coy. What kind of bullshit is that anyway? How about saying something meaningful like, "I think we would get along well, and I'd love the chance to get to know you". Or on the flip side, "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?". If more people made their intentions clear at the start, less people in general would get hurt. Of course there are no black and whites here, and I sure as hell have been around the block long enough to know that. It may start out as an interest for something more, but may very well end in a just looking to hook up situation. We never really know what we want, or if we are ready to take big steps until the choice comes to us. And we are LUCKY if we even know the real answer before the decision is made. Which is why we get ourselves into situations like bad marriages, or bad relationships, or good relationships that never began.
In the interest of cutting the bullshit, I'm devoting this last paragraph to my own flaws in relationships. They make me itchy and uncomfortable, call me selfish but I just hate being obligated to anyone. I don't do intimacy, I don't share my problems, and I don't really care for you to share yours with me. I hate communicating, sappy shit makes me wanna yak, and when it boils right down to it, I am much happier being single. The flip side, I don't cheat, I don't lie, I speak my mind. If you're ever hurt or in trouble, I am the first person on the scene, and no matter how much I may hate being a relationship, I genuinely want to think they can work. But hey, I am a 23 year old Starbucks Barista who lives with his parents and is waiting to go back to school so he can get a real job and move out. I've been given every opportunity in life, I have a fantastic relationship with my mother, and don't even know what real work is. I celebrated the release date of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 by beating Modern Warfare 1 the day before, I watch anime on Hulu, and read fantasy fiction. And that is pretty much that. God this whole thing was long winded.
So I suppose it would come to no surprise to anyone who's read at least 2 of my ridiculous blogs, but I like to write about my interactions with the opposite sex. Maybe it is a way for me to sound dark and brooding, or maybe I like self mastication, but before I begin this week's post, let me assure any readers that this is done in no way to make myself look good. Quite the contrary, I keep hoping someone will comment on one of these and call me on my bullshit. Or maybe I am just a narcissist. Onto the continuation of my probably entirely misguided assumptions.
This week I thought I would ask a few different questions. I've discussed location of women, and how that will change the types you will meet (much as I am against typecasting in general), as well as evolution of sexual fantasies. The hell bent need women sometimes seem to have to be in love. And god knows I've got other blogs on my myspace that were written long ago about similar topics and probably make even less sense than the ones I have posted now.
I would now like to touch on the topic of the games people play, as well as the things people THINK are games, but are actually true. They say that an average of half the things people say in jokes they actually mean, however phrasing whatever they are saying in a joke allows them to stay safe and gauge reactions. This makes perfect sense, and for those of you who might need an example, well, here you go:
Guy: "Wouldn't it be funny if your sister had a crush on me."
What he's really trying to say: "God I hope your sister has a crush on me."
Now that you know exactly what I'm saying, I can continue. Why do we go through all of this nonsense? Have we really gotten so sensitive as a society that we are constantly afraid to say what we are thinking or feeling? Why can't "Guy" just say he digs "Girl's" sister? Sure it might sting, and certainly it will make her angry. But let's for a second ignore the obvious; What if her sister was truly this guy's soulmate? Sister, best friend, roommate, whatever the case may be, do any of us really have the right to say that two people have no business being together? If there is one thing I am realizing after a love life full of "shoulda, woulda, coulda, but didn't" and all around bad timing, wrong friend, wrong sister, wrong party, wrong break up bullshit, it is that there aren't as many people in this world as we'd like to think.
Sit for a second and really analyze how often you meet new people. Now make a couple categories. Friends, Idiots, potential Lovers. I guarantee you that one of those columns will receive the majority. Now amongst that list, lets look at potential lovers. How many of them will you ever see again? How many will you see for a long time? And how many of them will eventually make their way into one of the other two columns. That's the interesting thing about love, isn't it? Someone can start in the Potential Lover category, and later be moved into Idiots or Friends. The same is not true of people that start in the Friend or Idiot category,
Now how many of us live near cities? We have a leg up, the pool from which we can meet new people is far larger than for others. So barring that, or hell, including that even, should we really be narrowing the field for each other? The amount of people with which we can conceivably form real connections with is limited to start with, simply by the sheer amount of personalities which we all possess. Sure, we can have a few exceptions, if I was truly in love with a woman then my friends and family should stay away from them, but if I had a couple weeks of fun with a woman and called it quits early, I have no intention of saying they are off limits. I've dated over 20 women, I've truly loved 2, that leaves 18+ entirely viable options which I would wish my friends the best of luck with. We need to stop getting in each other's way.
Futhermore, we need to start saying what we are thinking. If I meet a girl and I am interested, I have to be coy. What kind of bullshit is that anyway? How about saying something meaningful like, "I think we would get along well, and I'd love the chance to get to know you". Or on the flip side, "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?". If more people made their intentions clear at the start, less people in general would get hurt. Of course there are no black and whites here, and I sure as hell have been around the block long enough to know that. It may start out as an interest for something more, but may very well end in a just looking to hook up situation. We never really know what we want, or if we are ready to take big steps until the choice comes to us. And we are LUCKY if we even know the real answer before the decision is made. Which is why we get ourselves into situations like bad marriages, or bad relationships, or good relationships that never began.
In the interest of cutting the bullshit, I'm devoting this last paragraph to my own flaws in relationships. They make me itchy and uncomfortable, call me selfish but I just hate being obligated to anyone. I don't do intimacy, I don't share my problems, and I don't really care for you to share yours with me. I hate communicating, sappy shit makes me wanna yak, and when it boils right down to it, I am much happier being single. The flip side, I don't cheat, I don't lie, I speak my mind. If you're ever hurt or in trouble, I am the first person on the scene, and no matter how much I may hate being a relationship, I genuinely want to think they can work. But hey, I am a 23 year old Starbucks Barista who lives with his parents and is waiting to go back to school so he can get a real job and move out. I've been given every opportunity in life, I have a fantastic relationship with my mother, and don't even know what real work is. I celebrated the release date of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 by beating Modern Warfare 1 the day before, I watch anime on Hulu, and read fantasy fiction. And that is pretty much that. God this whole thing was long winded.
fashionista:
I love your realness. lol