*Tigger warning*
So this time, three years ago, was probably one of the toughest times of my life. I had been the most stressed I'd ever been at work, I'd just pulled myself away from an emotionally abusive and completely exhausting relationship, I was burning the candle at both ends, I felt unattractive, I had been bullied by someone I considered to be a best friend, I had lost my nana, among what felt like a tonne of other things... I felt like I didn't belong in this world and had felt so low that I tried to take my own life.
Now this isn't a cry for attention and I'd actually like to point out that a lot of good has happened since then - with regards to my mental health and therapy that has helped my thought process in becoming more positive. One of the most significant things that ever happened immediately after this was a heart to heart I had with my mother. I was so ashamed of what I had done. I was so upset at how I could have left her like this. I had had time to think about my friends, my family, my young niece who had completely looked up to me, my worth... My mother could completely understand how I felt and wanted to share this poem with me, that had helped her when she had been at her lowest.
It was called Desiderata by Max Erhmann. I read it. I read every single word. It was almost like an old version of Baz Luhrmann's "Sunscreen". It all made sense. It all made things so much clearer. It was all a life lesson and advice on how to live in such a complex world. Among so much chaos, there is still beauty. Among so much hatred, there is still love. These points really shone out at me. This particular line got me: "With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world." This made me really understand that, even with so much negativity around us, we can still experience the positives. There is always hope.
And this really stuck with me ever since. So much so, that I had it tattooed on me as a constant reminder of why I'm still here today! Because there is positivity in what may sometimes seem like an awful place. I framed it and put it on my bedroom wall too, it reminds me of how lucky I am to be alive, it reminds me that life is too short to be miserable.
If you're struggling right now, please read this. Please read this poem below. Please think about the positives, or at least try to see the positives in your situation. As hard as it is, it is entirely possible to uncover them. If you ever want to unload or let me help you in finding your positives with you, I'm here and I'm all for it. My dms are always open. Even if they get a little crazy sometimes, I see you. And I will always make time for you. 🧡
Desiderata
Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
By Max Ehrmann © 1927
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