phedra

"The Light Of Life"

Like a dream I remember it
a sick feeling twisting my stomach
a slight catch in my voice
tears coursing down my face.....
Running towards the sun, so happy, innocent, ..something pulled me back, a blackend hand grasping my hair, an acidic voice yelling in refusal of my passage to all things great. Oh my God, it hurts so bad this gnawing pain, a silent sob screaming to come out. He takes hold of my body I twist, I turn, scratching, biting, anything, calling for help desperately, but nobody comes.
The man drags me into an unknown hell, unimaginable before in my life, going passed so many cages filled with the lost, their hollow eyes staring back at me uncaring about anything. I, myself, am thrown into one of these cages, hitting the damp stone floor, hearing the door slam shut. I turn, finally getting a look at my captor, a slick grey vessel ragged to the bone, black hair matted to his disfigured head, his eyes, nothing but a black wasteland looking into the depths of my soul. HElp ME.....
Now alone I suffer in silence waiting for what might come, hours ,days pass.....even longer? As my body wastes away, my mind draws down into it's deepest level, wanting to do nothing but to let go. Nothing to do but watch my own demise. My pale soul shudders in pain as it longs for sustenance, the light that brings it to life, the joy it once had, now just a shadow of a thought. HElp ME......
The man aprroaches my cage, I stare, no life, no emotion showing, I am becoming one of the shells. He cackles and whispers " nobody wanted you, nobody cared, you were nothing...so it is my right to see the suffering, the heartbreak, the dead." I look up look into his eyes and see myself, my wasted body, my deaden eyes,and something inside sparks to life...is it hope?
This man's words, so simple, yet so profound, awakened a part of myself I did not know existed till that moment. There was somebody who cared, someone who wanted me to live, and it was myself. Rage takes hold of my body, a roar through hell, this life is not something I will give willingly. A light encompasses my body giving me strength to break the bares that held me. Nothing can stop what has taken hold of me, I am a power that can not be broken. I walk towards the man who had done this to me, my fist striking his chest, penetrating, taking his black heart as it crumbles in my hand, and finally he too becomes nothing. In my rage I had conquered death and embraced life.
I walk through the hall of cages looking at the victims of this hell, no one to save, for they all succumbed to their fears, not seeing the light that gave life. I leave them in sadness at the waste of what could of been. Running now, I rush towards what is mine the right to live with strength, courage, and pride and happiness.My willingness to go above my suffering, my past weakness in almost letting go, seeing death saved me. Now I have better dreams filled with a purpose. Great shadows cast by the light inside me foretell all great things to come.
My will be done, I am mine.
Stupid man thinking I would die for him...


This is the latest thing to come out of my head...it is drawn from a simple philosophy called objectivism. This philosophy came from one of the great philosophers of the 20th century, Ayn Rand. She is one to be admired and respected for she made life a beautiful concept-- it is ours and ours alone, and we have the right to pursue happiness in all things.
Life is slow going at the moment, my brother has been in the hospital for a month now. He had surgery on his colon, and intestines. Renaissance faire starts in just a few weeks, it is going to be a busy time, hopefully a good one too, just have to ignore all the money that has gone into it...lol .