pezboy7416

snow again finally! one of the five greatest beauties in the world. following music.girls.love.sex. ah. how exciting. it makes so many of us into little kids again when it snows. just no sledding please!!

yesterday i saw what was to me the most disturbing film i've ever seen with MY SHE. so i wasn't in the best state of mind as it was. if any of you ever get to know me which is hard cos i change so much i never know myself, you'll see that i have many "issues" for whcih i should be on several types of medication but refuse to use prescription drugs to make me docile.

so of course i have an attack on 3rd ave outside the theater and can't stop shaking for 5 minutes. i should've cried my eyes out in the movie but i was so deep inside my own head with all the pans banging around inside of it that it took me 2 hours later to relax enough to cry. oh well. MY SHE actually had the audacity to tell me"this is why i don't miss you". hmm.. so caring she was/is. HAH.

came home and sam beam cooled me down and sent me into a writing frenzy that ended 10 pages and several hours later. beauty hides everywhere.

i didn't even tell you what the movie was. monster. and i never want to see it again. we all have our secret demons and icy swimming holes in our heads, this film made me the saddest that i've ever been in my fucking life. which was the point of it and a very interesting feeling it was. for me that, too often and i'd snap completely.