I have decided now to make this my last year modelling, except in the most casual of ways. I'll always be there for friends who want to throw together a quick bonkers music video and the like, and if things pick up I do hope to go back to my burlesque, but I'm now into my forties and increasingly aware there are only a limited number of ways that a weird-looking, non-passing, mature trans woman can "make it" as a semi-pro model (and a lot of them that involve pandering to fetishes best left unmentioned ... not that I don't have my kinky side, but I do have my limits, and business and pleasure are an uneasy mix). Also, I've been working part time in Royal Mail in order to leave myself time for modelling - as the hours are short and the pay quite high - but some of my work colleagues are such toxic company that it's taken far too high a toll of my mental health to be worth it any longer. Getting a new job and getting my equilibrium back are thus the big goals for 2020 and beyond.
There is one more set I am determined to do before calling it quits, however, just because it's a character I badly want to cosplay and I can rarely get time off work for a comic-con (Another damn good reason to change jobs). Today, I've been working on her mask in preparation. It needs a bit of tidying up, the rest of the costume isn't finished, and I need to work out how to simulate explosions safely (due to the deadly and criminal nature of her job, this lady doesn't so much striptease as suffer violent pyrotechnic clothing damage on a regular basis), but hopefully a few obscure anime fans here can recognise where this is heading ... x