VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I'm running 10k this morning! I haven't trained at all! Hurrah!
Luckily I can bail at 5k if it all gets too painful.
I have had porridge with apple mush, am well hydrated and have actually washed my kit. Let's go!
My life is going to change today, I'm fairly sure of it.
In other news. The new Nintendo DSI advert? As pointed out by...
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Luckily I can bail at 5k if it all gets too painful.
I have had porridge with apple mush, am well hydrated and have actually washed my kit. Let's go!
My life is going to change today, I'm fairly sure of it.
In other news. The new Nintendo DSI advert? As pointed out by...
Read More
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
bettiebones:
Nice.
x
x
spamtwo:
Did you run the whole 10k?
The guy in the DSi advert would rather be playing Zelda
The guy in the DSi advert would rather be playing Zelda
Wedding is soon, soon for the wedding. Gosh so soon.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
harleen:
That's really soon! Let me know if there's an address we can send a little something something to you both <3
harleen:
6th of June! Looking forward to it. Will you be on honeymoon?
I hate stuff that beeps
Phones
Alarms
Ovens
and particularly the angry, shitty beep noise my car makes when you tey to put the alarm on and the door isn't shut properly.
Phones
Alarms
Ovens
and particularly the angry, shitty beep noise my car makes when you tey to put the alarm on and the door isn't shut properly.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
spamtwo:
they should make all sat navs sound like HAL 9000 
niobe:
Happy Earth Day! 
We went to an awesome lezza wedding yesterday.
My wife to be did the Dirty Dancing lift with the groom and danced to MC Hammer with granny.
We were at that stage of drunk where you truely believe that you are the greatest dancer.
It was a lovely day.....I cried......it started to dawn on me that our wedding is not very far away at all!...
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My wife to be did the Dirty Dancing lift with the groom and danced to MC Hammer with granny.
We were at that stage of drunk where you truely believe that you are the greatest dancer.
It was a lovely day.....I cried......it started to dawn on me that our wedding is not very far away at all!...
Read More
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
harleen:
Hello sweetness - I'm gonna be in Liverpool for a friends birthday / tattoo convention in June. Are you planning on going? There's a pirate themed night or something at the uni on the Saturday, which we apparently are going to. I might dress up as big bird though, pirates are so 2004.
harleen:
Saturday 6th June , that's as much as I know at the minute x
, that's as much as I know at the minute xI had a Tuesday night at work without discussing erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation and wanking!
And a night time carpet picnic.
And I have the day off tomorrow.
I feel vaguely normal.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
sticks:
A discussion without talk of erectile dysfunction is like a day without sunshine.
zombieelvis:
I'm not sure there's anything dysfunctional about not being able to get erect. It'd solve an awful lot of my problems. I'd be climbing tress and playing with train sets and stuff, which is exactly the sort of awesome thing I used to do before erections came along. Anyone complains to you about erectile dysfunction, give them a meccano set and remind them how great it was in the old days.
I'd much rather be building a truck with strips of hole-punched metal than busying myself in a pair of messy flaps, waiting for the whole disgusting spectacle to be over.
I'd much rather be building a truck with strips of hole-punched metal than busying myself in a pair of messy flaps, waiting for the whole disgusting spectacle to be over.
Spring
She waited:
breath held,
lungs bursting,
for spring to come and take the edge
(the mirror sharp
skate blade
broken glass
icicled edge)
off; to bring the relief
of green
and blue. Waited.
Waited through dryer lint
grey skies
flattening and heavy
falling wet and cold
on already chapped cheeks;
waited, still, red fingers numb,
through dark drives to work
and dark drives home...
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She waited:
breath held,
lungs bursting,
for spring to come and take the edge
(the mirror sharp
skate blade
broken glass
icicled edge)
off; to bring the relief
of green
and blue. Waited.
Waited through dryer lint
grey skies
flattening and heavy
falling wet and cold
on already chapped cheeks;
waited, still, red fingers numb,
through dark drives to work
and dark drives home...
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
zombieelvis:
No, but they have hoods. Tall pointy white hoods.
Nice poem. I both subscribe to and enjoy your Smelly Lezzer cannon of work, but wonder if you could perhaps post something from your lesser -known 'Aids Mop' period?
Nice poem. I both subscribe to and enjoy your Smelly Lezzer cannon of work, but wonder if you could perhaps post something from your lesser -known 'Aids Mop' period?
zombieelvis:
I just got an urge to poo.
Gah, I have to clean my car today.
It smells of council estate.
It smells of council estate.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
zombieelvis:
Can I sit in a cupboard and wait for your grannies to walk past? Can I lunge at them with an eclair? Can I ask what it's like to be so old and know so much about the world? Can I ask what it was like during the war? Can I ask what Jesus really looked like? Can I ask what the best way to get grass stains from my pants is? Will they dance with me like they did in the old days? Do they have wheelchairs? Can I push them around the car park a while? Can we go shopping? Will they buy me a cake? Or a toy? Will they remember me at Christmas? Can I go and stay with them? Can I move in with them and win their affection and eventually replace you both in their wills? Will they make me say prayers? I hate saying prayers. Can we tell stories instead?
harleen:
Your car smells of stale pee? Dirty cow...
What an odd week I'm having, makes me feel all out of sorts. Or is it because I'm out of sorts that I'm having an odd week?
I'm often amased at my capacity to be reasonable and maintain control. To do the grown up, proper thing.
Thing is what I really want to do is react how all my instincts are telling me to. To...
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I'm often amased at my capacity to be reasonable and maintain control. To do the grown up, proper thing.
Thing is what I really want to do is react how all my instincts are telling me to. To...
Read More
the_fox:
I'm happy to do the irresponsible thing on your behalf.
First session of tattoo tweaking done!
Much much happier with it.......and cheaper.......and without all the incessant moaning.
Much much happier with it.......and cheaper.......and without all the incessant moaning.
spamtwo:
Cheats never prosper, well actually they do, unless they get caught
Tis sad about my kitty but my boyfriend has assured me that he has gone to heaven, which is of no comfort to me and he always tells me I'm going to hell. He's a bum.
x