Sweet Tumescence by Joshua Allen
Another NaNoWriMo has come and gone. Round midnight last night I wrote the closing words of my novel, set down my pen, and enjoyed a celebratory flute of champagne on my balcony, the city lights sparkling like magical golden jewels or amulets.
I am very pleased to share my latest work, entitled Sweet Tumescence, with you, my friends.
Chapter 1
Savannah True was the best locksmith in town. This one time she managed to get the Mayors secret closet open after he flushed the key down the toilet because he thought the FBI was at the door when actually it was just Fat Frankie doing one of his classic pranks lol. Yes, Savannah True could unlock anything except her heart.
Chapter 2
Someone murdered Savannah True. No one knew who did it or how or what kind of weapon they used. The cops were stumped.
Chapter 3
A writer lived in this town. He had always loved Savannah Trues smile and laugh and mouth, and the way her succulent breasts looked like quivering balloons of gentle flesh. He wrote a poem about her that was very powerful.
Chapter 4
Call me Ishmael. Some years ago never mind how long precisely having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world.
Chapter 5
FUCK THIS AND FUCK YOU DHFJKGHJKFNG
Epilogue
mention something about savannah true having a jealous boyfriend who killed her with something
