pastura

The Constant Yearning

"We are like lutes once held by God. Being away from his warm body fully explains the constant yearning." - Hafiz

This is my philosophy: "God" is actually the Universe of which we are a part for all of Time, including our minute human lives. Ironically, it is only when we are briefly human that we think we are special, apart from and above the universe from which we draw breath and in which we were created (by Nature) and are suspended. Yet no matter how independent we like to think we are, we cannot unglue ourselves from the lurking idea that there is something bigger than our terrestrial lives. So we seek our universal, cosmic relationship in the form of gods and goddesses and prophets.

In truth, we are looking for ourselves - but we cannot fully understand our "self" if we do not accept its infinite nature (in both time and space). We will look with semi-open eyes and never see. We have this entire universe in front of us, right here, and yet we look through our telescopes. But how can we hope to understand the stars if we do not understand this earth? if we do not understand that we are this earth? We are, ourselves, another manifestation of clay. But we forget what it felt like to be a part of the dirt and so we set out wandering the earth and looking into the sky - and still we do not see the universe. It's just like being unable to see the forest for the trees. We are in this air and of it, this air is in and of the universe, yet we cannot understand that we are this universe.

God is not dead. God breathes every time I bring atmosphere and clouds and living cells and elements into my lungs. Every time you send recycled wind into our world. God is not a being. God is being. Being a part of this ever-expansive organism.

Our understandably limited human minds tell us lies about our very nature - somehow we become convinced we are special in all the cosmos and proceed to chase our tails with a fanaticism and a fear that crystalize into formal religion. And because we are all pursuing the same prey through different paths, we fall into whichever model seems to benefit our "solitary" pursuit best, not realizing each and every one of us is a piece of the truth we seek. Unfortunately, however, mostifnotall of our attempts to name this "power" fall hopelessly short. Money, Christianity, Islam, the cult of Hollywood - all of these religions fail at acheiving the goal we have incorrectly named. Others may come closer at illuminating ways to live in harmony with the universe, but how often is it acknowledged that we ARE the universe?

This is not something you can learn from a teacher or a book; it must be discovered alone, unprompted. It is at best, I think, a feeling. A hunch. A spiritual vibration. That's the closest we can get to understanding something so big without causing the cosmos to implode. So why am I telling you? Another human compulsion.

Next time you see a shooting star - admire its beauty, but remind yourself it exists because we are hurtling through an enormous void. A void of which you are an essential particle. And like Joni Mitchell said, we're made from the very same stuff as those fiery beauties anyway. When our bodies are in the earth under our feet and our breath is in the sky around us, we don't question our place. Only when we walk on two feet do we ask: is there something bigger out there? Of course there is! Just look!