found this old email exchange today amongst the clutter of 1's and 0's:
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: xxxx
Date: Aug 13, 2004 01:59 PM
mmph
well. i'm glad you decided to write me today, to find me however you did.
in the realization of imperminence and the practice of unattachment-- how do you suppose true love is possible and what is your opinion of it. or are we truly to seek un-romantic passing love, as we do for the sentient beings as a whole?
this is my stumbling block, when i look at my needs and desires, the things that lead me to suffering, etc.
love is the hardest one to let go of.
let me know your thoughts should you feel it (commas or not)
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: paralax999
Date: Aug 13, 2004 05:08 PM
Good fucking question.
It reminds me of a day at my kitchen table nursing a very broken heart. Im reading this cat Anthony Demello (who I recommend highly, not usually liking the bodhi tree type literature) and he says, no one else can ever make you happy. And I laughed that beautiful gut, pure, out loud laughter; for forty-five minutes. Since then I have endeavored to love myself (despite myself) and not worry too much about the rest. I dont think that the universe is short on love. True love? I would like to believe, but usually it just leads to me accepting unacceptable behavior. I think the answer (which I sadly do not possess) exists in the moment. Being present. Accepting things for what they are, not what I want them to be or to become. And not rushing off, or being impatient (I want Now!). a wise man told me once that a soul mate is not found but something that is built over time. I also think that love takes so many forms and beautiful shapes, and that I tend to overlook these in favor of the prefab form sold to me in so many shapes and so often called romantic love. Not that I am not a romantic, but I cannot overlook all the shades of love in preference to merely one. And ultimately, I must accept that perhaps I will be alone for the rest of my life. And to face this, I build friendships, stay connected with family, enjoy small love affairs, and ultimately trust that love is all around me, and that I am loved. Does this help me from obsessing, hoping, dreaming, and suffering? I havent yet found my bodhi tree to sit under, but I dont quite need to listen to the smiths as much as I used to.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: xxxx
Date: Aug 13, 2004 01:59 PM
mmph
well. i'm glad you decided to write me today, to find me however you did.
in the realization of imperminence and the practice of unattachment-- how do you suppose true love is possible and what is your opinion of it. or are we truly to seek un-romantic passing love, as we do for the sentient beings as a whole?
this is my stumbling block, when i look at my needs and desires, the things that lead me to suffering, etc.
love is the hardest one to let go of.
let me know your thoughts should you feel it (commas or not)
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: paralax999
Date: Aug 13, 2004 05:08 PM
Good fucking question.
It reminds me of a day at my kitchen table nursing a very broken heart. Im reading this cat Anthony Demello (who I recommend highly, not usually liking the bodhi tree type literature) and he says, no one else can ever make you happy. And I laughed that beautiful gut, pure, out loud laughter; for forty-five minutes. Since then I have endeavored to love myself (despite myself) and not worry too much about the rest. I dont think that the universe is short on love. True love? I would like to believe, but usually it just leads to me accepting unacceptable behavior. I think the answer (which I sadly do not possess) exists in the moment. Being present. Accepting things for what they are, not what I want them to be or to become. And not rushing off, or being impatient (I want Now!). a wise man told me once that a soul mate is not found but something that is built over time. I also think that love takes so many forms and beautiful shapes, and that I tend to overlook these in favor of the prefab form sold to me in so many shapes and so often called romantic love. Not that I am not a romantic, but I cannot overlook all the shades of love in preference to merely one. And ultimately, I must accept that perhaps I will be alone for the rest of my life. And to face this, I build friendships, stay connected with family, enjoy small love affairs, and ultimately trust that love is all around me, and that I am loved. Does this help me from obsessing, hoping, dreaming, and suffering? I havent yet found my bodhi tree to sit under, but I dont quite need to listen to the smiths as much as I used to.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
dusana:
hey what's your email...I have a copy of the meetings for you 
taurus:
I am in your hood now. I want to go scootering?