panicfunction

hello again, its been some time. i was on holiday back home without a computer for a while, it was dire. (not, i hasten to add, because of the lack of computer). i met up with some old friends which was nice but most off the time there was no one around and i was moping around in the house. as soon as i got back my sister went off to Australia for three months, and my other siblings were still in school. when i could i hooked up with some friends but because im not there most of the time theyve all got other lives of which im not a part. i was pretty miserable the whole time. still it wasnt all bad, it was good to see my family again, and i needed a rest from bangor, it was good to get away.
after that i spent a week in the peak district which is a national park in the north of England which is pretty hilly and has some great climbing. i was there to climb with a party from a school which i live near. i was kind of there as a semi-instructor, to teach the kids a bit, because none of them had ever climbed out doors before, i have and my dad is one of the instructors at the club. it was a really great time, i didnt get much climbing done but spent a couple of days in beautiful weather teaching a couple of people to lead climb. after that we stayed up there without the kids to do some of our own climbing but the weather closed in and we didnt really get anything done. Ive put a couple of photos up from the trip. unfortunately (or not) i was photographer a lot of the time so there arent many of me or of anything interesting, most of the ones i took were of the kids so i didnt put many up.
i got back last Monday but since have been really hectic getting work done and stuff. i did get my hands on a ray tracer for my pc so ive started experimenting with it a bit and making pretty pictures. ive put a few up in my picture folder, its all very simple stuff but im just starting to teach myself, so hopefully in the future ill have something more interesting to put up.
many apologies for not being back to the site for a while, ill try to catch up in the next couple of days.
Thank you all for your expressions of concern, truth be told ive been really far down and still am, i know i havent bottomed out yet but im fighting it. ive flipped out a few times recently but i think im getting towards stability, i hope. i dont recall ever being this bad before, but maybe that is just memory. i dont think im going to do anything.