Marriage not for me!
"A marriage is a committed relationship between or among individuals, recognized by civil authority and/or bound by the religious beliefs of the participants. This dual nature, a binding legal contract plus a moral promise, makes marriage difficult to characterize."
Here is my reasoning why I will never get married. Just as I mentioned how today's morals and responsibly have changed as in my post "feminizing men" . I also think responsibilities have change. The reason for people getting married now may be slightly different than what they were 100-1000 years ago. Marriage was used in the past as a way of monogamizing relationships, even though polygamy was still an issue.
Marriages today have many facets and many meanings and definitions.(in the USA)
Legal binding by the courts: You are bound by law together, you share legal and financial responsibility and the court is there to make sure you do so. It is this foothold that the government has in marriage that frustrates me the most. They tell you who you can marry (no gay marriages) they tell you who gets what when you leave each other, they are the mommy and daddy of your personal life with your soul mate.
Ceremonial: I know the ceremony of marriage today is very important. What woman DOESN'T want to wear the white dress and have all that she dreamed of all of her life. I think a lot of the programming into women at young ages sets an expectation at what they should strive for when they get married. Every woman that gets married has a predetermined fantasy or idea of what her marriage day SHOULD be like. The ceremony is VERY nice indeed, but I think the desire for ceremony DOES overshadow a lot of what marriage is REALLY about. A lot of women and men may disagree, but ask them if they would feel that marriage is cheapened if they were to just sign some paper work, look into each others eyes and just say they will love each other forever. if they say "yes" then they really do lack the feeling of what true marriage and commitment should be about. I know this isn't such a big issue cause honestly I wouldn't mind giving a ceremony to my woman if she wants one because I am not going to steal that day from her that she has been dreaming of. I just wish that girls would stop being programmed to have that "White Wedding" when in fact less than 10% of women and men that get married are NOT even virgins and 50% of marriages end in divorce. It almost seems to lose its PURITY.
Excuses and Reason: The worst reason to get married is because of an excuse or reason that you feel is justified like... "I am pregnant, we have to get married." or "We need to get married so it will be harder to leave each other" even though it isn't worded like that it is what I have heard as an excuse as <em>"If we aren't married what is keeping you from just walking away?" WTF?!
FIRST: Kids are no reason to get married. If you really feel your child will grow up in a better environment because you had a ceremony and legal paper work filled out then you are wrong. Forcing yourself to get married causes additional stress on a household that would be much more negative for a child than something the child knows nothing about. As long as you love your child, show him strong family values and respect he wont give a rat's ass if you and partner are married or not. (and yes insurance does cover your children and life mates even if your not married, there are ways of setting that up)
SECOND: If you are getting married to make it harder to leave each other then your bond isn't as strong to begin with and there is no reason to get married in the first place. Your HEART will decide if someone is going to leave. Not a Marriage.. which is why divorce rate is so high, and why you can get divorced for 99bucks down at the local divorce store.
Religion:I am not religious, so the whole bond spiritual thing for the afterlife I never get. So I will not go into this.. I don't want to start a religeous debate.
It isn't that I don't' trust my partner and or the institution of marriage. I believe that one can be with someone their whole life and tell them and show them they love them without letting government or anyone else decide what makes a strong family.
Thank You.
"A marriage is a committed relationship between or among individuals, recognized by civil authority and/or bound by the religious beliefs of the participants. This dual nature, a binding legal contract plus a moral promise, makes marriage difficult to characterize."
Here is my reasoning why I will never get married. Just as I mentioned how today's morals and responsibly have changed as in my post "feminizing men" . I also think responsibilities have change. The reason for people getting married now may be slightly different than what they were 100-1000 years ago. Marriage was used in the past as a way of monogamizing relationships, even though polygamy was still an issue.
Marriages today have many facets and many meanings and definitions.(in the USA)
Legal binding by the courts: You are bound by law together, you share legal and financial responsibility and the court is there to make sure you do so. It is this foothold that the government has in marriage that frustrates me the most. They tell you who you can marry (no gay marriages) they tell you who gets what when you leave each other, they are the mommy and daddy of your personal life with your soul mate.
Ceremonial: I know the ceremony of marriage today is very important. What woman DOESN'T want to wear the white dress and have all that she dreamed of all of her life. I think a lot of the programming into women at young ages sets an expectation at what they should strive for when they get married. Every woman that gets married has a predetermined fantasy or idea of what her marriage day SHOULD be like. The ceremony is VERY nice indeed, but I think the desire for ceremony DOES overshadow a lot of what marriage is REALLY about. A lot of women and men may disagree, but ask them if they would feel that marriage is cheapened if they were to just sign some paper work, look into each others eyes and just say they will love each other forever. if they say "yes" then they really do lack the feeling of what true marriage and commitment should be about. I know this isn't such a big issue cause honestly I wouldn't mind giving a ceremony to my woman if she wants one because I am not going to steal that day from her that she has been dreaming of. I just wish that girls would stop being programmed to have that "White Wedding" when in fact less than 10% of women and men that get married are NOT even virgins and 50% of marriages end in divorce. It almost seems to lose its PURITY.
Excuses and Reason: The worst reason to get married is because of an excuse or reason that you feel is justified like... "I am pregnant, we have to get married." or "We need to get married so it will be harder to leave each other" even though it isn't worded like that it is what I have heard as an excuse as <em>"If we aren't married what is keeping you from just walking away?" WTF?!
FIRST: Kids are no reason to get married. If you really feel your child will grow up in a better environment because you had a ceremony and legal paper work filled out then you are wrong. Forcing yourself to get married causes additional stress on a household that would be much more negative for a child than something the child knows nothing about. As long as you love your child, show him strong family values and respect he wont give a rat's ass if you and partner are married or not. (and yes insurance does cover your children and life mates even if your not married, there are ways of setting that up)
SECOND: If you are getting married to make it harder to leave each other then your bond isn't as strong to begin with and there is no reason to get married in the first place. Your HEART will decide if someone is going to leave. Not a Marriage.. which is why divorce rate is so high, and why you can get divorced for 99bucks down at the local divorce store.
Religion:I am not religious, so the whole bond spiritual thing for the afterlife I never get. So I will not go into this.. I don't want to start a religeous debate.
It isn't that I don't' trust my partner and or the institution of marriage. I believe that one can be with someone their whole life and tell them and show them they love them without letting government or anyone else decide what makes a strong family.
Thank You.
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odette:
totally. so...
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111111111yennabear:
hi