Well, it all appears to be over now. Nothing left for it but to move on and try to make the most of whats left of me. That being said, hows about I stop being so depressing here and get back to what I do best, being an amusing jackass. Deal? Deal.
Friends, I call upon you to stand with me against a great evil. Something so insidiously subtle you may not even have considered it until now. I speak, of course, about the epidemic of Direct-to-Video sequels that the DVD format has unleashed upon us. No longer can I sit idly by as our landfills runneth over with hundreds of millions of sequels to films that shouldn't have been released in the first place.
These sequels used to be confined strictly to films of lesser quality. DVD has made the process so affordable now that anyone can make a sequel to practically anything. Recently Starship Troopers 2 hit the local rental shelf. The original was an amusingly inaccurate adaptation of Heinlein's classic novel. The sequel There are words yet to be invented to describe the depths of shitty this film plumbs. Nudity couldn't even save this title, but don't think they didn't try.
Not to be left behind, TimeCop joined the roster of 90's sci-fi flicks to receive the direct to DVD treatment. TimeCop was bad. TimeCop 2 is absurd. Jason Scott Lee, former Next Big Thing who, like so many before him, fell into the depths of obscurity, stars in this little Petri dish of cinematic Ebola. TimeCop 2 can at the very least be enjoyed for the sheer audacity of the ludicrousness it constantly displays. Most time travel movies can't escape a paradox or two, this film wallows in them. You'll be falling out of your chair laughing one moment, and banging your head against the wall the next.
The stakes in this game went up with the release of Carlito's Way: Rise to Power, a prequel to the cult classic staring Al Pacino. Right from the start this film is in trouble, sporting a title entirely to close to the video game Jet Li: Rise to Honor. Beyond the title, further omens of doom. The film boasts amongst its stars P. Diddy and Mario Van Peebles. Yeah, sign me up for that ride!
We have to put a stop to the madness now kids. If we don't take a stand, how long will it be before we start seeing DVD sequels like Lawrence of Arabia 2: Electric Boogaloo or perhaps Citizen Kane: The Quickening or even Ben Hur Reloaded. Stand tall, fight the power and May the Force be with you.
Friends, I call upon you to stand with me against a great evil. Something so insidiously subtle you may not even have considered it until now. I speak, of course, about the epidemic of Direct-to-Video sequels that the DVD format has unleashed upon us. No longer can I sit idly by as our landfills runneth over with hundreds of millions of sequels to films that shouldn't have been released in the first place.
These sequels used to be confined strictly to films of lesser quality. DVD has made the process so affordable now that anyone can make a sequel to practically anything. Recently Starship Troopers 2 hit the local rental shelf. The original was an amusingly inaccurate adaptation of Heinlein's classic novel. The sequel There are words yet to be invented to describe the depths of shitty this film plumbs. Nudity couldn't even save this title, but don't think they didn't try.
Not to be left behind, TimeCop joined the roster of 90's sci-fi flicks to receive the direct to DVD treatment. TimeCop was bad. TimeCop 2 is absurd. Jason Scott Lee, former Next Big Thing who, like so many before him, fell into the depths of obscurity, stars in this little Petri dish of cinematic Ebola. TimeCop 2 can at the very least be enjoyed for the sheer audacity of the ludicrousness it constantly displays. Most time travel movies can't escape a paradox or two, this film wallows in them. You'll be falling out of your chair laughing one moment, and banging your head against the wall the next.
The stakes in this game went up with the release of Carlito's Way: Rise to Power, a prequel to the cult classic staring Al Pacino. Right from the start this film is in trouble, sporting a title entirely to close to the video game Jet Li: Rise to Honor. Beyond the title, further omens of doom. The film boasts amongst its stars P. Diddy and Mario Van Peebles. Yeah, sign me up for that ride!
We have to put a stop to the madness now kids. If we don't take a stand, how long will it be before we start seeing DVD sequels like Lawrence of Arabia 2: Electric Boogaloo or perhaps Citizen Kane: The Quickening or even Ben Hur Reloaded. Stand tall, fight the power and May the Force be with you.