I got an Email today from a girl I dated whom I was very close to, like, kind of entertained the idea of marrying. Which feels weird even to write. In the Email she told me that she's pregnant. Now...before jumping to conclusions...it should be said that her due date and the last time we were together do not add up and it is not my child. However, it is really weird knowing that something really drastic has happened to her and I will never know her in the same context as I used to. Okay, I'll admit that I was upset when I got the news. It's as if whatever it was that we shared has now been completely severed with finality. Maybe I should be happy about that. Of course, I hope that she's happy about it and that she is able to finish grad school and I hope that she has support and all that. However, this is my blog and so it's about me being upset and feeling really conflicted about it.
Later on this evening after getting a drink and heading back to my studio I got a call from a very good, long time friend who wanted to let me know that another good, but not quite so long time friend was talking a bunch of shit about me at the bar to a group of people I know. Apparently he was recounting a story of my childhood which I shared with him about eating a urinal cake. I have no problem with this, but I guess the story was being told in a very condescending manner and like all things, was a matter of context. I am also a little put off by that fact that only one person that I've called a friend out of a group stood up for me in my absence, but I am really touched that she called to keep me up on things.
So what the fuck? Maybe I should be flattered instead of hurt. Maybe some people have a problem with the success of others. Maybe I shouldn't let it bother me. Maybe.
Also, I did not go to see Dragonforce tonight because I wanted to paint and did not want to get stuck in Worcester overnight due to the shitty schedule maintained by the commuter rail. Lame, but not crushing.
On the upside, I started a ton of new stuff in my studio and now have paintings and drawings going on every available wall space as well as a good portion of the floor.
What a weird fucking day.
Later on this evening after getting a drink and heading back to my studio I got a call from a very good, long time friend who wanted to let me know that another good, but not quite so long time friend was talking a bunch of shit about me at the bar to a group of people I know. Apparently he was recounting a story of my childhood which I shared with him about eating a urinal cake. I have no problem with this, but I guess the story was being told in a very condescending manner and like all things, was a matter of context. I am also a little put off by that fact that only one person that I've called a friend out of a group stood up for me in my absence, but I am really touched that she called to keep me up on things.
So what the fuck? Maybe I should be flattered instead of hurt. Maybe some people have a problem with the success of others. Maybe I shouldn't let it bother me. Maybe.
Also, I did not go to see Dragonforce tonight because I wanted to paint and did not want to get stuck in Worcester overnight due to the shitty schedule maintained by the commuter rail. Lame, but not crushing.
On the upside, I started a ton of new stuff in my studio and now have paintings and drawings going on every available wall space as well as a good portion of the floor.
What a weird fucking day.
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JK. You want embarrassing stories? I got volumes upon volumes! Call me if you ever need to feel good about yourself...seriously.
This week was apparently quite the week in metal on all geographic fronts. 3 shows this week in what seemed to be an eternity! 1349, D666, Celtic Frost, all in the span of 4 days. My head hurts.