wow. have you ever had anyone you couldn't get rid of? someone that will always be there. even as a memory you couldn't get rid of him? I thought i had gotten rid of him. I was happy for a while. Now he's back again. He knows what I've been doing. He says hes worried. He's calling later to check up on me. Jay: i fell off the wagon. getting back on will be hard. He knows my deepest secret now. He wants me to get help. I can't. I don't know what to say to him that I haven't already said. He says things will be better. I don't believe it. We all make mistakes, and my biggest one is him.