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oregonmusician85

Humble, TX

Member Since 2010

Followers 3 Following 4

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Saturday Nov 20, 2010

Nov 20, 2010
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BIG NEWS today. I mean Seriously BIG news.
This is like people moving rocks and coming back from the dead and shit news. The grand pontiff himself has made an announcement!

Catholics can NOW USE CONDOMS!

Wait...that seems less big now that I consider most people who give a shit use them anyway...but STILL.
CATHOLICS now have the god given write to strangle their their Johnsons with plastic just like the rest of us.

One caveat though. You cannot use them to prevent pregnancy. Since when did preventing pregnancy become the SIDE effect of condom use? Oh...now I see. the Pope made an slight change...an addenda if you will. He condones condom use only for those that are not "worried about procreation, such as male homosexual prostitutes". Well all of you MALE HOMOSEXUAL PROSTITUTES can rest east now knowing that the pope is allowing you to wear condoms. I know that you were all very worried about using condoms because you just KNEW that the Vatican was looking in on you and saying "Do what you want but you better not even THINK about using a condom" (sorry women, you're still not allowed because your next John might have super sperm that will create the next savior in your womb).

Really Benedict? I'm not religious so I may be slightly out of date on the catechism but I always assumed that the church had bigger fish to fry with prostitutes and homosexuals. I could be very wrong, but I think I can safely say that a good portion of male homosexual prostitutes couldn't give less of a shit about what you say in regards to condom use.

Hopefully Benedict will come to his senses and give an exemption to male priests as well. They fuck with people's heads enough without giving herpes to their altar boys.

Thank you Catholic church for constantly reminding me how ridiculously out of touch you are with EVERYTHING.
hexxus:
good times..


any bday plans yet?
ill be gone all next weekend which is when you would probably be doing something.. or maybe you wont as a lot of people are probably doing family stuff. i dunno lol

Nov 20, 2010

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