I'm trying to cram before therapy tomorrow.
My homework is to challenge my core belief. However this year a lone has validated it and I can't get around it. So I sit here and cry. I feel like crap. I suddenly see very clearly that I smoke so much pot for a reason.
I'd rather feel nothing than have to deal with all this pain. By that reasoning I'd be taking anti-depressants. Do I really have dysthymia? If I can't get over this hurdle am I doomed?
Many people would trade their life for mine in a heart beat. I know I'm a good looking guy. I have one of the hugest hearts of anyone I know. I have a promising career. I'm accomplished. I can look after myself...
But one thing in my life has stopped me so entirely that I can't move forward in my personal life. For someone who's job it is to find solutions to problems... this is so puzzling. I feel like I'm trying to move a mountain. Which saying that tells me that I'm looking at the problem in the wrong ways. I'm so puzzled. So hurt.
My homework is to challenge my core belief. However this year a lone has validated it and I can't get around it. So I sit here and cry. I feel like crap. I suddenly see very clearly that I smoke so much pot for a reason.
I'd rather feel nothing than have to deal with all this pain. By that reasoning I'd be taking anti-depressants. Do I really have dysthymia? If I can't get over this hurdle am I doomed?
Many people would trade their life for mine in a heart beat. I know I'm a good looking guy. I have one of the hugest hearts of anyone I know. I have a promising career. I'm accomplished. I can look after myself...
But one thing in my life has stopped me so entirely that I can't move forward in my personal life. For someone who's job it is to find solutions to problems... this is so puzzling. I feel like I'm trying to move a mountain. Which saying that tells me that I'm looking at the problem in the wrong ways. I'm so puzzled. So hurt.