I am dumb. I checked out my ex. I guess in a moment of pain some old wounds come out. I need someone to turn to me and say exactly the thing I need to hear right now, but even I don't know what that would be.
I'm so angry at my friend who's been helping me through. I think that maybe its best that what happened yesterday happened and that I needed it to move on with my life. I'm obviously clinging onto people. I just have a lot of hurt. I obviously make it worse. I know I should know better.
I think the important thing I need to hear is that
I affected her life and she effected mine. You know the moments she made me happy, were peak. Just amazing. I guess that is what it was. It was a beautiful time in my life and I should appreciate it for the beauty it created. The personal growth and the feelings that were awakened were epic. I guess love is like a flower. Its ascension is slow but swift and then blooms and dies. I guess some love is like other plants
I think I just had my moment of clarity.
Our love was a perfect storm. It consumed me entirely. I miss being in love. I miss being it. I miss the feeling, and I miss her. But I know I miss the feeling that she brought with her. What helps me move on out of these ruts every-time that I know if we got back together it wouldn't ever be the same. Thats reassuring.
You know, I've done everything wrong in 2009. Fuck you and good bye 2009! Let 2010 be the year to rock my socks.
And to think I was going to make this private
I've been steadily moving forward and I gotta remember that I always get over heart breaks, but it just takes me longer than most. I've forgotten who I am.
A friend of mine asked me
"What you mean move forward"
I said
"Forward as in away from her"
Obviously that is my problem. I've tried to move away from her when really I should be moving closer to me.
Struggle eternal
Soul seeks & will know no answer
I've discovered new path
I'm so angry at my friend who's been helping me through. I think that maybe its best that what happened yesterday happened and that I needed it to move on with my life. I'm obviously clinging onto people. I just have a lot of hurt. I obviously make it worse. I know I should know better.
I think the important thing I need to hear is that
I affected her life and she effected mine. You know the moments she made me happy, were peak. Just amazing. I guess that is what it was. It was a beautiful time in my life and I should appreciate it for the beauty it created. The personal growth and the feelings that were awakened were epic. I guess love is like a flower. Its ascension is slow but swift and then blooms and dies. I guess some love is like other plants
I think I just had my moment of clarity.
Our love was a perfect storm. It consumed me entirely. I miss being in love. I miss being it. I miss the feeling, and I miss her. But I know I miss the feeling that she brought with her. What helps me move on out of these ruts every-time that I know if we got back together it wouldn't ever be the same. Thats reassuring.
You know, I've done everything wrong in 2009. Fuck you and good bye 2009! Let 2010 be the year to rock my socks.
And to think I was going to make this private
I've been steadily moving forward and I gotta remember that I always get over heart breaks, but it just takes me longer than most. I've forgotten who I am.
A friend of mine asked me
"What you mean move forward"
I said
"Forward as in away from her"
Obviously that is my problem. I've tried to move away from her when really I should be moving closer to me.
Struggle eternal
Soul seeks & will know no answer
I've discovered new path