t-minus until the real world goes away.....
I've always been a fucking strange fellow. Especially when it comes to psychedelics. They've been one of the greatest eye openers in my life than any day in church when i was little. HAHA!
I love that point where I've taken a massive dose of something and then i'm waiting...in limbo....for the world to change.
Musically, psychedelics changed me too. Especially after hearing psychedelic music for the first time. Being here, San Francisco now for a year or so....it feels like a good time to be here. The band i was once in...we're now starting to see that our own ways are starting to part. So, I recommend a last hurrah.
I suppose i was the leader in this group. I'm a control freak. Someone gives me control and i freak out. haha!
My background...in a nutshell..was highly sheltered. I grew up in Kansas City, and i went to a very strict Baptist school most of my life. They were fucking insane...all of them for the most part. In 2001, i think it was....the pastor's wife shot and killed their daughter because she was going to move in with her boyfriend and they weren't married. Crazy shit! I remember their daughter. she was a senior when i was still in 4th grade....but the seniors were required to watch us kiddies at least once a week and teach us bible verses.
hmm...shit like that pisses me off. because Jenny Sooter was cool...she wasn't like all the other stiff and brainwashed baptist seniors. if she only knew...she would've just packed up and left without saying anything.
instead...it cost her life. her own mother shot her....and then herself.
But yeah, so i was sheltered. and finally around 8th grade i get thrown into public school...and it was a whole nother world....i sort of retreated. hiding from the people. it was all too much.
then in high school i got introduced to pot. which was incredible. and since pot is really a social kind of thing, i suddenly had all these friends and smoking buddies. you didn't have to be cool, or good looking....if you whipped out a jay everynow and then..it was all good.
Music started hitting me....I started listening to all this "forbidden" music that i wasn't allowed to listen to before.
I particularly loved the Beatles and Pink Floyd. and then when i started doing acid.....everything changed.
I picked up the guitar...and just went with it. the love affair with creating music just captured me. I read an interview Hendrix gave...about how music was like a lover to him. and i really loved that.
music is my lover even today. anytime i get horribly depressed or just fucking out of it....playing a tune really soothes me. on a very deep level.
meditation also really gave me a big leap in terms of just calming the inner waters down. my senior year of high school, i sold acid to help pay for college.....and i spent a vast majority of that year tripping.
I had some amazing experiences just tripping and meditating.
the whole spiritual aspect of life started to make itself apparent. and i did the whole new age thing...i went to sedona and all that. life took on several new meanings when i began to see the energy of things.
the energy that living things give off. it's alot easier to see in humans, but animals have it and so do plants.
after i saw that....it really changed my whole mental attitude to things. i never really believed in stuff like that until then. it was all mumbo jumbo crap....but when you see it for yourself. everything changes.
I started getting into deeper meditations. I picked up some meditation tapes that had a pulse on it that vibrated at the same level as the brain does when it reaches the theta brainwave state. it's a deeper level of relaxation.
but it's also very close to the level your brain is at right before you go to sleep. so i'd use the tape and meditate and i'd always fall asleep.
after a while i got the hang of staying awake while being in a deep trance......then the whole floodgates open up. very similar to doing DMT. which if any of you are curious...I'd highly recommend doing DMT or ayahuasca. it will show you things. you will learn quite alot in a short span of time.
it's a knowledge you won't necessarily be able to convey in just words. alot of it may seem inexplicable.....to the normal waking mind yes. but theres other aspects of yourself that it will show you...and well......then it's a process of unraveling. old pain, old trauma, past injustices, fear. and actually beginning to process all that inner stuff.
I've always been a fucking strange fellow. Especially when it comes to psychedelics. They've been one of the greatest eye openers in my life than any day in church when i was little. HAHA!
I love that point where I've taken a massive dose of something and then i'm waiting...in limbo....for the world to change.
Musically, psychedelics changed me too. Especially after hearing psychedelic music for the first time. Being here, San Francisco now for a year or so....it feels like a good time to be here. The band i was once in...we're now starting to see that our own ways are starting to part. So, I recommend a last hurrah.
I suppose i was the leader in this group. I'm a control freak. Someone gives me control and i freak out. haha!
My background...in a nutshell..was highly sheltered. I grew up in Kansas City, and i went to a very strict Baptist school most of my life. They were fucking insane...all of them for the most part. In 2001, i think it was....the pastor's wife shot and killed their daughter because she was going to move in with her boyfriend and they weren't married. Crazy shit! I remember their daughter. she was a senior when i was still in 4th grade....but the seniors were required to watch us kiddies at least once a week and teach us bible verses.
hmm...shit like that pisses me off. because Jenny Sooter was cool...she wasn't like all the other stiff and brainwashed baptist seniors. if she only knew...she would've just packed up and left without saying anything.
instead...it cost her life. her own mother shot her....and then herself.
But yeah, so i was sheltered. and finally around 8th grade i get thrown into public school...and it was a whole nother world....i sort of retreated. hiding from the people. it was all too much.
then in high school i got introduced to pot. which was incredible. and since pot is really a social kind of thing, i suddenly had all these friends and smoking buddies. you didn't have to be cool, or good looking....if you whipped out a jay everynow and then..it was all good.
Music started hitting me....I started listening to all this "forbidden" music that i wasn't allowed to listen to before.
I particularly loved the Beatles and Pink Floyd. and then when i started doing acid.....everything changed.
I picked up the guitar...and just went with it. the love affair with creating music just captured me. I read an interview Hendrix gave...about how music was like a lover to him. and i really loved that.
music is my lover even today. anytime i get horribly depressed or just fucking out of it....playing a tune really soothes me. on a very deep level.
meditation also really gave me a big leap in terms of just calming the inner waters down. my senior year of high school, i sold acid to help pay for college.....and i spent a vast majority of that year tripping.
I had some amazing experiences just tripping and meditating.
the whole spiritual aspect of life started to make itself apparent. and i did the whole new age thing...i went to sedona and all that. life took on several new meanings when i began to see the energy of things.
the energy that living things give off. it's alot easier to see in humans, but animals have it and so do plants.
after i saw that....it really changed my whole mental attitude to things. i never really believed in stuff like that until then. it was all mumbo jumbo crap....but when you see it for yourself. everything changes.
I started getting into deeper meditations. I picked up some meditation tapes that had a pulse on it that vibrated at the same level as the brain does when it reaches the theta brainwave state. it's a deeper level of relaxation.
but it's also very close to the level your brain is at right before you go to sleep. so i'd use the tape and meditate and i'd always fall asleep.
after a while i got the hang of staying awake while being in a deep trance......then the whole floodgates open up. very similar to doing DMT. which if any of you are curious...I'd highly recommend doing DMT or ayahuasca. it will show you things. you will learn quite alot in a short span of time.
it's a knowledge you won't necessarily be able to convey in just words. alot of it may seem inexplicable.....to the normal waking mind yes. but theres other aspects of yourself that it will show you...and well......then it's a process of unraveling. old pain, old trauma, past injustices, fear. and actually beginning to process all that inner stuff.