so i'm having a few beers for cinco de mayo.
i know drinking at home alone is not a good habit to foster. but none of my friends were up for going out.
the one i'd like to be out with is hanging out with people i guess she'd rather be around. since i'm not drinking all the time and i have a job and responsibility during the day and don't have any pills or pot lying around to share with her, i suppose i'm farther down the roster than i had thought.
i know, this maybe isn't a person i should associate with if this is the case. it's tough to sever ties with someone you love, even in a situation like this.
it just plain sucks than i possibly am seen as a prude or stick in the mud for the simple fact that i have made a decision to not drink to the point that i can't remember shit from last night or medicate myself or smoke myself retarded.
it just isn't what i've decided is the right thing for me. pills don't really work for me(in case you haven't noticed, i'm a pretty large guy) except in doses that scare the shit out of me. pot makes me sleepy and lethargic.
that doesn't mean i look down on or won't be around people doing that shit.
i just resent being thought of as someone she would rather not be around when she's doing that. like i'm gonna judge her for it.
i guess i'm not cool enough. but who's gonna be there when she needs a true friend? i doubt any of the worthless fucks she's surrounded by will. it will be me she calls.
maybe one day i just shouldn't answer.
fuck it.
i know drinking at home alone is not a good habit to foster. but none of my friends were up for going out.
the one i'd like to be out with is hanging out with people i guess she'd rather be around. since i'm not drinking all the time and i have a job and responsibility during the day and don't have any pills or pot lying around to share with her, i suppose i'm farther down the roster than i had thought.
i know, this maybe isn't a person i should associate with if this is the case. it's tough to sever ties with someone you love, even in a situation like this.
it just plain sucks than i possibly am seen as a prude or stick in the mud for the simple fact that i have made a decision to not drink to the point that i can't remember shit from last night or medicate myself or smoke myself retarded.
it just isn't what i've decided is the right thing for me. pills don't really work for me(in case you haven't noticed, i'm a pretty large guy) except in doses that scare the shit out of me. pot makes me sleepy and lethargic.
that doesn't mean i look down on or won't be around people doing that shit.
i just resent being thought of as someone she would rather not be around when she's doing that. like i'm gonna judge her for it.
i guess i'm not cool enough. but who's gonna be there when she needs a true friend? i doubt any of the worthless fucks she's surrounded by will. it will be me she calls.
maybe one day i just shouldn't answer.
fuck it.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
azrael_abyss:
I think you're fun as shit sweetie. Definitely not a stick in the mud or a prude. I've had to drop many friends like that over the years, or they've dropped me. as much as i hate saying it, it's something that's part of life, or so I've learned so far. If we had been there we could have all gone out. *shakes fist* damn you Germany! I hope all gets better honey. 
for you!
for you!
stacie:
I totally forgot about cinco de mayo. It didnt even really get advertised out here and im right on top of mexico. Strange that florida woops it up so much for it.