onesecondmore

i guess things are getting better. i can't complain, really. i found out my friends are planning a cruise in january, and the OT i got forced into working this week will cover it. sweet.

i'm going to orlando by-my-fucking-self saturday afternoon to see alkaline trio. that's mainly because i have to work saturday til 4, haul ass home to let the dog out, then drive down for the show.

this is the first time in almost a decade i've ever left town to see a band. my ex girl(but current friend) will be there, but i'm sure she's gonna be so trashed by the time i show up that i'm probably just better off holding up the walls as usual. she worries me. there's just no talking to people regarding their behavior sometimes, though. it's only gonna fall on deaf ears. it's just tough when the person i love more than anything has to do such rotten things to herself. if she ever listened to me it would be a first.

being alone really, really- and i mean really- sucks. yeah, yeah, yeah...i know that there's someone else out there somewhere, but whomever she is, she's way too fucking far beyond the horizon at the moment. this is actually a thought that i'm ok with, since i'm such a mess right now.

i'm learning that whatever doesn't kill me only pisses me off.

i really need to stop brooding over shit.