onesecondmore

there might be something wrong with me.

as badly as i want to just go out and do something, meet people, whatever- i can't seem to make myself get out there.

of course, that may be because the last few times i've been out by myself i drank way too much to be behind the wheel and drove anyway. it's a miracle i'm not dead and no one is dead because of me. i'm ashamed to admit that.

i rarely drink, but i definitely do when i go to a bar or to a show, just to get me over the misanthropic jitters.

i wish i could find a group of folks to hang with when out, so we could take turns driving. all my friends are more weekend warriors than anything else, but i just want to do things during the week every now and then.

i suppose i could ramble more and more, but it's pretty much a waste.

in a nutshell, i don't go out much because i've no one to go out with, and i've no one to go out with because i don't go out.

i'm fucked.