The following list contains things people have actually told me while I was trying to help them at work:
1) Atheists cannot be helpful or good people.
2) Stopping kids from breaking things damages their creativity and curiosity.
3) I'm an asshole because we don't put up Christmas Trees in June.
4) As a state employee, I'm responsible for all of the governor's actions.
5) I'm working with the FBI to prevent people from accessing records that don't exist.
6) A man born in 1923 can get married in 1908.
7) My building is the Division of Motor Vehicles, and I need to stop lying.
8) Smyrna, Delaware, is the hub of all civilized life.
9) Maps have temporary detours included on them.
10) I don't like stupid people (this one is serious)