omaru

I feel like every time I write a blog it's nothing but misery, and every time I'm miserable I consider my options of leaving this place.
When I do this I can picture certain people saying "good, get the fuck out of here RETARD!!!!" maybe those are the people that should inherit SG as a whole. Do they deserve it? Probably not, but over the ages we've always awarded the selfish and confident. Or perhaps more fitting, they've always rewarded themselves as they believe they are entitled.

SG is what it is, a blog, a site, pics of girls, the chat, it was a place where I thought I could change things for me, like the minority or majority... because I really don't know what the fuck other peoples motivations are for being here, I thought this place would be the key to me finding.... whatever it was I needed to fill the empty gaping vast of nothingness. But this is not the case.
I've been here almost a year and a half and I still don't feel like I've made any progress, talking is hard being interesting is hard, it's hard to draw upon the good points when you're so negative. Sure we've shared a joke, had a few laughs, and I've called you my friend, but have we really ever bonded? (One of you I speak to almost every night, you know who you are I guess so thanks for listening) but for some of you I'm just that 'fun loving, oft troubled individual' which is a sort of fair assessment, or I'm that annoying prick who's always trying to be funny, and always failing.. Which is equally as true. I'm a nice but dumb, fuck up.

I have no idea how much longer I intend to stick around, but I've been feeling distant more and more over the last few weeks, theres like 4-5 people I look forward to seeing from time to time, but I generally don't feel like talking pointless banter at this time.