ohtheirony

I find that my mind is cruel to me.
During spring cleaning I came accross a picture that a girl gave me 10 years ago. I believe it was the greatest picture ever taken - the light, the soft look on her face, the smile just for me, the note on the back, the glint in her eyes...I thought it was gone forever, and I'm awefully glad I found it.
But it presents problems to have it and to think about it again. We never ended up together - not in any physical sense. We were the bestest friends - we hung out constantly for years. Long story short, we haven't been close in the last few years. I miss her so terribly sometimes that it's all I can think about.
The real problem: we are both in situations that would prevent anything like the friendship we once shared, so I'm reluctant to spend any serious amount of time with her - not that the option has presented itself.
I chat with her every now and then - there's always a slight sexual tension - and I'm afraid that the instant we see each other, there's going to be fucking.
That presents a problem on a scale more grand than I care to imagine...
But I imagine it every time I close my eyes.
I can't get her out of my head.
I don't know that I want to.
Cruel...