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Damn it. Fucking damn it.....
So I go to a Halloween party Saturday night. Not expecting much other that some the same old crowd drinking themselves stupid yada yada yada.

Not wanting to go, I do anyways. Just to get out of the house and see if there are any single ladies out.
What I did find was a lot of old memories. I hear...
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oddlot:
Update.....

So far I've meet a painful memory, aka my middle school ex, at a Halloween party and got her number, and apparently her attention.


So it doesn't work out that we hang Sunday but she did want to chill Monday. Called me just as I was leaving work so.... sweet!! this'll work out great. Got home took a shower and went to pick her up at her moms. What the hell am I doing??? I should have some ill feelings for this chick. She did fuck around with my best friend.

Pick her up and we go get a few drinks. Great idea huh. We talk and catch up more. A little more sober and aware than at the party were we meet again after 16 years of life. I talk her into coming over to hang out and smoke sum pot. I'm wondering this whole time about what feelings I have now for this woman. Like I said I should be mad or upset about what she did to my best friend and I in middle school.

The real kicker is that I know this girl has been in some shady situations in life. Drugs, partying, promiscuity ect. Who am I to judge? I've been in some if not most of the places she has been other than the sleeping around thing. I don't do one night stands. Only sleep with girls I've been with for a while and really have feelings for. Apparently she was a lot more open.

So I've got this girl all over me yet holding herself back because she says she is trying her damnedest to stay true and not cheat on a guy who asked her to be exclusive. I hold out and respect what she's trying to do. I'm an idiot. Should have and could have taken her right then right there. She later said that she almost jumped my bones and wouldn't have stopped me if I took her. I don't know what to think at this time. Her sister comes over and picks her up to stay at her house that night.

Lots to think about....
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Thrashed by another girl. Yes believe it or not. I'm a perpetual single oddity. I'm a bit quiet and polite... But do have a wild side to me. A side not limited by fear or fame. I could care less about being the popular guy, or by being the ass hole who treats ppl. like shit and have everyone love me for it...
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He's not perfect. You aren't either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn't going to quote you poetry, he's not thinking about you...
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Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel ,
"Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead
you to the Promised Land."

Nearly 75 years ago, (when Welfare was introduced) Roosevelt said,
"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, this
is the Promised Land."

Today, Congress has stolen your shovel, taxed...
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Fuelled by fear and adrenaline, I live life in the moments I understand and exist is the rest.
Life comes to me in spurts. A continuously changing landscape of hills and valleys, but mine are mere mountains and abyss.
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If you've ever looked back into your life and gone wow i remember that and laughed about it. You might want to think of what you can do today so you will want to remember it tomorrow.
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Why does it feel like Wednesday already? Oh right, because I had to work on Sunday. Come on Friday.
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I liked Mondays until I meet today. Then I grew and grew and grew. Disgust and mistrust Is all that's new.

Sitting on ones ass for twelve hours doing nothing sucks. Finally I'm going home!!! To take a shower.
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Unknown to Death, nor known to Life.
Having a light side and dark side is what makes life interesting.
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New dude here.
Hello to all.
That is all.

Good day.