So been in the chat room and just analyzing things here about people in general.
I notice allot of friendly meaningless conversations that seem more as a front that we do when going in a pool of strangers to see what the mood is.
1. we start off talking about something completely irreverent.
AKA someone always starts a conversation of "I like cheese!"
Somebody else then always follows it up with something just as innocent kid humor. We are testing the water. Seeing if someone will knock you down.
Then we got the quite ones. The ones that stare for hours until they feel ok to jump into the conversation.
Once the ball starts rolling, we then go for the personal experiences. One thing it looks like, the majority of us have had a drug spree in our lives. Someone talks about how much time they are spend trying to get off something seriously addictive while others who have broken free from it give little nudges of encouragement without trying to show too much feeling.
Once that starts up serious conversation, it gets interesting... Someone who is not just ready yet to spill his or her sins responds back with another stupid innocent message, just to get the subject changed. "I like cheese!"
People LOL and it starts another 40 minutes of nonsense.
One thing also happens is we meet "the selfish one." The one who is coming in to vent on the no names. They start personal attacks on the person whos spilling their heart out which then changes the conversation. Negative attacks fly from thier keyboard. Trying to be witty, they start like a guy with a machine gun smacking smart-ass remarks to people's comments towards their behavior. Then they get a rush of satisfaction if they are good enough. They just in that time said to everyone "I am better than all of you! Thanks for proving I am better then you all."
Of coarse then their are the grunts. The ones who start taking sides, to avoid becoming a victim of this person's brash antics. He laughs along or makes stupid hints that agree with their attitude.
The hole crew who can't stand it anymore starts saying identical cruel sayings. Just before the person can reply.. they log off pissed off. Likely to return to see if the ass has left in 2 hours.
The smart ass now has control of the conversation. Like a sato cult, the weak ones start kissing more ass as the fucker starts to brag how great they are and how things suck. The fucker won, but the hope to connect with people is lost.
The smart ass has now created shallow play room where people hide behind clichs and meaningless conversations.
I see this too with some of the SG girls while reading their journals. The ones with emotional detachment write about meaningless things. However there are some of them that are trying to reach out.
They try by expressing their frustrations of their current financial woos and boyfriend troubles. Others mention how they don't feel good about themselves. Others just talk about how they feel they are not being recognized by all the hard work they are doing and the sacrifices they have made to even be on SG. They admit they expected consistant positive attention. All They see though are selfish men who only got one thing in mind... and it's not equally gratifying.
Those are the ones I appreciate. Why? Because they have been where we all have been once in our lifetime. Hurt by someone or some event, but they still have the courage to reach out to see if someone is willing to come back and say "I know where you are coming from."
We here at least here in the United States have become so scared of being hurt, we come up with our own different fronts to protect ourselves. I myself admit I am a full sized target when it comes to criticism. I pull the "look at me" thing when in a group of people by getting into conversations about some serious political or social issue.
I do that more now to see who is wiling to connect on a personal level. Usually people who don't want to open up will do the same thing we do in a chat room. Start talking about nonsense to change the subject, or sometimes are doing it because they really don't care. I find out though some don't want to talk about serious issues because they don't want to come off as being dumb... which they are not. I think it ends up because they don't want to be laughed at... which I don't think as being an adult would happen.
We have become pretty shallow as people. Now being single I am hearing horror stories of guys being at bars and women coming up to them to ask what kind of car they drive. I suggested they come back with this answer...
"I drive a Myyur Shallow 2.0. What do you drive?"
We seem so wound up in having everything our way. We have become selfish. We just in it for the money attention, the raise, or the promotion. We shop for people like we are looking at products in a store window. And we all comply. We pretty ourselves up and give the front we are a particular person... when in reality we are just mimicking what we want people to think.
Once we actually get to the point of being ourselves.. we disappoint the person and they bail on them. Like theyre spoiled in some of the cruelest ways. Which them just justifies to the hurt one to close up more. It's vicious.
I remembered back during my 20's when first dating my ex wife. We were enjoying some wine coolers on the curb. She said to me "Why do you have the Mohawk and the leather jacket and spikes?"
I replied: "Because I'm a non-conformist. I enjoy intimidating people"
What I didn't expect was the reply: "So other words your saying, you non-confirming by confirming to a click?"
I paused and thought about it. "You are so right." I replied.
Since then I try not to "pretty myself up". Dont get me wrong. I love the shirts. I like the clothing I especially love the scene. I like the uniqueness. The common bond thing. Allot has to do with not having such the great parents that I find allot of us really didn't have when we grew up. Mine consistently told me I was lazy and a waist of time. My friends were my family. "I know why thats why I am the way that I am." as Popeye would say.
I got a huge thing about having intimate time with women because of this. And seems like I am one of the few. I admit like any guy I enjoy the sex, but the time just laying there caressing someone and hugging the hell out of them with out saying a word is the reward for me. When a woman just grins and sighs in acceptance. I feel like 100 bucks.
It seems like though allot of guys arent like that. They just want to park in and jump ship once they are done. I get complements from women I have been with that I was the first they had that actually made them feel good about themselves after words. Knowing that I am doing something right. Thing is, where the hell are these women when I need them
We just read this and admit to your self "Man, I can relate. I feel that way too."
I notice allot of friendly meaningless conversations that seem more as a front that we do when going in a pool of strangers to see what the mood is.
1. we start off talking about something completely irreverent.
AKA someone always starts a conversation of "I like cheese!"
Somebody else then always follows it up with something just as innocent kid humor. We are testing the water. Seeing if someone will knock you down.
Then we got the quite ones. The ones that stare for hours until they feel ok to jump into the conversation.
Once the ball starts rolling, we then go for the personal experiences. One thing it looks like, the majority of us have had a drug spree in our lives. Someone talks about how much time they are spend trying to get off something seriously addictive while others who have broken free from it give little nudges of encouragement without trying to show too much feeling.
Once that starts up serious conversation, it gets interesting... Someone who is not just ready yet to spill his or her sins responds back with another stupid innocent message, just to get the subject changed. "I like cheese!"
People LOL and it starts another 40 minutes of nonsense.
One thing also happens is we meet "the selfish one." The one who is coming in to vent on the no names. They start personal attacks on the person whos spilling their heart out which then changes the conversation. Negative attacks fly from thier keyboard. Trying to be witty, they start like a guy with a machine gun smacking smart-ass remarks to people's comments towards their behavior. Then they get a rush of satisfaction if they are good enough. They just in that time said to everyone "I am better than all of you! Thanks for proving I am better then you all."
Of coarse then their are the grunts. The ones who start taking sides, to avoid becoming a victim of this person's brash antics. He laughs along or makes stupid hints that agree with their attitude.
The hole crew who can't stand it anymore starts saying identical cruel sayings. Just before the person can reply.. they log off pissed off. Likely to return to see if the ass has left in 2 hours.
The smart ass now has control of the conversation. Like a sato cult, the weak ones start kissing more ass as the fucker starts to brag how great they are and how things suck. The fucker won, but the hope to connect with people is lost.
The smart ass has now created shallow play room where people hide behind clichs and meaningless conversations.
I see this too with some of the SG girls while reading their journals. The ones with emotional detachment write about meaningless things. However there are some of them that are trying to reach out.
They try by expressing their frustrations of their current financial woos and boyfriend troubles. Others mention how they don't feel good about themselves. Others just talk about how they feel they are not being recognized by all the hard work they are doing and the sacrifices they have made to even be on SG. They admit they expected consistant positive attention. All They see though are selfish men who only got one thing in mind... and it's not equally gratifying.
Those are the ones I appreciate. Why? Because they have been where we all have been once in our lifetime. Hurt by someone or some event, but they still have the courage to reach out to see if someone is willing to come back and say "I know where you are coming from."
We here at least here in the United States have become so scared of being hurt, we come up with our own different fronts to protect ourselves. I myself admit I am a full sized target when it comes to criticism. I pull the "look at me" thing when in a group of people by getting into conversations about some serious political or social issue.
I do that more now to see who is wiling to connect on a personal level. Usually people who don't want to open up will do the same thing we do in a chat room. Start talking about nonsense to change the subject, or sometimes are doing it because they really don't care. I find out though some don't want to talk about serious issues because they don't want to come off as being dumb... which they are not. I think it ends up because they don't want to be laughed at... which I don't think as being an adult would happen.
We have become pretty shallow as people. Now being single I am hearing horror stories of guys being at bars and women coming up to them to ask what kind of car they drive. I suggested they come back with this answer...
"I drive a Myyur Shallow 2.0. What do you drive?"
We seem so wound up in having everything our way. We have become selfish. We just in it for the money attention, the raise, or the promotion. We shop for people like we are looking at products in a store window. And we all comply. We pretty ourselves up and give the front we are a particular person... when in reality we are just mimicking what we want people to think.
Once we actually get to the point of being ourselves.. we disappoint the person and they bail on them. Like theyre spoiled in some of the cruelest ways. Which them just justifies to the hurt one to close up more. It's vicious.
I remembered back during my 20's when first dating my ex wife. We were enjoying some wine coolers on the curb. She said to me "Why do you have the Mohawk and the leather jacket and spikes?"
I replied: "Because I'm a non-conformist. I enjoy intimidating people"
What I didn't expect was the reply: "So other words your saying, you non-confirming by confirming to a click?"
I paused and thought about it. "You are so right." I replied.
Since then I try not to "pretty myself up". Dont get me wrong. I love the shirts. I like the clothing I especially love the scene. I like the uniqueness. The common bond thing. Allot has to do with not having such the great parents that I find allot of us really didn't have when we grew up. Mine consistently told me I was lazy and a waist of time. My friends were my family. "I know why thats why I am the way that I am." as Popeye would say.
I got a huge thing about having intimate time with women because of this. And seems like I am one of the few. I admit like any guy I enjoy the sex, but the time just laying there caressing someone and hugging the hell out of them with out saying a word is the reward for me. When a woman just grins and sighs in acceptance. I feel like 100 bucks.
It seems like though allot of guys arent like that. They just want to park in and jump ship once they are done. I get complements from women I have been with that I was the first they had that actually made them feel good about themselves after words. Knowing that I am doing something right. Thing is, where the hell are these women when I need them
We just read this and admit to your self "Man, I can relate. I feel that way too."