northern

So.... I'm now 41 years old.

I'm tempted to say "Yikes!" But I don't really feel that way. Which is a great relief since some of you may recall that my last birthday was stressful mentally. Normally I barely notice my birthday, but last year was different. I felt very stressed by it.

So I'm glad that I'm back to not really caring.

I had take-out fish and chips with my mom, and watermelon for dessert. I'm pretty easy to please.

I got my gift from my mom a couple months ago. A renewal of my subscription to mental_floss magazine. If you haven't heard of it, you must track it down and read an issue. For someone like me, who likes to fill their brain with lots of useless facts, it's amazing. Seriously, an entire magazine devoted to trivia. Visit their website - they have loads of things online too. Mental Floss


A few weeks ago, I finally saw my psychiatrist. He's reduced the dose of my anti-psychotic, and increased the dose of my main anti-depressant. He's hoping that will help me not only feel better mood-wise, but also reduce my lethargy.

It's hard to tell if it's made me more awake, since we've been through an almost non-stop heat wave since the change was made. And the oppressive heat makes me tired. I want to sleep through the hot days.

But my moood? Hrmm.... it's slightly better. Not so blah now. That was the problem. I felt blah - affectless. Now I actually feel things, at least more so than before.

And I was relieved to find out that it didn't require a change of anti-depressant. I hate having to try something new. I never used to feel that way, because I had always had good luck with med changes. A couple years that changed, when one anti-depressant made me really irritable and angry, and another had the paradoxal effect of making my depression worse. So now I'm a bit gun shy when it comes to changing meds.

The reduction in anti-psychotic didn't really worry me though. My schizophrenia has always been very well controlled by medication, and I pay attention to the symptoms since I absolutely fear having a psychotic break. My only psychotic period had very serious consequences, and I dread having it happen again.

So, I'm doing better than blah. And that's an improvement.


I've actually done a bit of cleaning in my house. I can see parts of my floor now. And I've been updating my website. It's been rather neglected for far too long, only being updated when someone contacts me to correct information on it. So I'm finally going through and checking everything on it.


I think I'll stop here. Not much else to say, since I have less to complain about.


Thank you to everyone who wished me a Happy Birthday. It means a lot.