So...
I've realized today, I'm happy. I'm happy with myself and I'm happy with my life. I may not always be excited with the things that go on in my life...but I can better myself and learn from them.
I was talking to a friend today and I was looking over my life and a lot of things that have caused hurdles in my life usually has something to do with a decision that I made. I know not everyone is perfect but I have realized that I need to be more conscious of my decisions and realize that every action has a reaction.
The thing I regret most is that I have hurt so many people throughout my life due to my decisions. To those people, I'm extremely sorry. I don't like hurting people. So I'm going to try and make sure I think about everyone that is involved when I make a decision. I'm not naive however I do know that sometimes it's inevitable to hurt someone. But, here is my promise now...to put others before myself and remember how my reactions could affect them.
So two of my friends have called me tonight bawling their eyes out. They were broken up with. One: her and her boyfriend broke up on Halloween. My other friend was broken up with yesterday. I understand where they are both coming from. And for the most part I can go to them with anything. But, I think my friends are under the impression that I don't get hurt, because I don't like to show much emotion around people, I would rather seclude myself when I'm upset. My one friend who's boyfriend broke up with her on Halloween definitely doesn't understand that sometimes I hurt too. When me and Dan recently ended things I turned to her and she told me, "You'll be fine because you don't let people in anyways so it's not like you can be that hurt. And you are a pretty girl, you will have no problem getting a boy...you are just making it worse than what it seems, it's not like you were with him for three years like I was with Lindsey(yes her boyfriend's name was Lindsey)..." Yes, it's true I wasn't with Dan as long as them, but nonetheless I did love him and it hurt to lose him. But I've accepted it on my own...that's also why there has been so many blogs about it because to my friends I guess I can't hurt. I don't mind being the friend that people can turn to and talk to me about their problems, but I just want to be able to return the favor whenever I feel like I need to talk to someone. Meh, I guess that's why I have SG
So come March, I'm either getting a piercing or a tattoo...or both. For my piercing I either want: Dermals, my nipples or my septum...I'm debating. And for my tattoo I want a Phoenix. It all depends on how much I get back for my tax refund. So let's hope I get a lot back, because I also have to save some of that money.
Well I think this is it for now...
It feels good to be happy in my skin and with who I am.
PEACE!
I've realized today, I'm happy. I'm happy with myself and I'm happy with my life. I may not always be excited with the things that go on in my life...but I can better myself and learn from them.
I was talking to a friend today and I was looking over my life and a lot of things that have caused hurdles in my life usually has something to do with a decision that I made. I know not everyone is perfect but I have realized that I need to be more conscious of my decisions and realize that every action has a reaction.
The thing I regret most is that I have hurt so many people throughout my life due to my decisions. To those people, I'm extremely sorry. I don't like hurting people. So I'm going to try and make sure I think about everyone that is involved when I make a decision. I'm not naive however I do know that sometimes it's inevitable to hurt someone. But, here is my promise now...to put others before myself and remember how my reactions could affect them.
So two of my friends have called me tonight bawling their eyes out. They were broken up with. One: her and her boyfriend broke up on Halloween. My other friend was broken up with yesterday. I understand where they are both coming from. And for the most part I can go to them with anything. But, I think my friends are under the impression that I don't get hurt, because I don't like to show much emotion around people, I would rather seclude myself when I'm upset. My one friend who's boyfriend broke up with her on Halloween definitely doesn't understand that sometimes I hurt too. When me and Dan recently ended things I turned to her and she told me, "You'll be fine because you don't let people in anyways so it's not like you can be that hurt. And you are a pretty girl, you will have no problem getting a boy...you are just making it worse than what it seems, it's not like you were with him for three years like I was with Lindsey(yes her boyfriend's name was Lindsey)..." Yes, it's true I wasn't with Dan as long as them, but nonetheless I did love him and it hurt to lose him. But I've accepted it on my own...that's also why there has been so many blogs about it because to my friends I guess I can't hurt. I don't mind being the friend that people can turn to and talk to me about their problems, but I just want to be able to return the favor whenever I feel like I need to talk to someone. Meh, I guess that's why I have SG
So come March, I'm either getting a piercing or a tattoo...or both. For my piercing I either want: Dermals, my nipples or my septum...I'm debating. And for my tattoo I want a Phoenix. It all depends on how much I get back for my tax refund. So let's hope I get a lot back, because I also have to save some of that money.
Well I think this is it for now...
It feels good to be happy in my skin and with who I am.
PEACE!VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
From two days ago ... for music what tops my play lists ... Julia Othmer, Allison Iraheta (yea I know, whatever, I like almost every track on our freshman album), Sara Bareilles, The Ting Tings, and a blast from the past, Evanescence. All can be found on iTunes.
I didn't read all your past blogs, just bookmarked ya (as a posting on a group you just did) ... but its a new year, new starts, whatever. If you need a vacation, norcal and the San Fran bay area is really cool.