nonlocal

I was in the Navy working in a weapons lab and had come up with a new defensive material for war ships, air craft and military vehicles of all kinds. It was a molecular sized nano-tube material that, when activated, would cause a quantum phase shift of any energy or matter (same thing) that struck it. So a cruise missile warhead would be phase shifted...
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While optimism is a rational choice, it doesn't necessarily follow that things will be peachy. Obviously never constantly but there can be long spells that test optimism.

And if you happen to be a class A procrastinator like me, the spells can drag on and on.

Of course knowing that makes it easy to correct the course and run into something good...or bad, whatever.

In the scheme of things I've always been of the mind that optimism is a rational choice in a universe wherein the probabilities are better than 50-50 for success (we wouldn't be here if they weren't).

Superstring theory is music to my ears.

Things make sense when there is melody and harmony.

....

Sometimes I think the best is behind me now.

I've done that a lot...wasted a whole fucking lot of time being depressed and not doing a damn thing.

Then I get bored and do something. The thing that's fucking with me now is that the last thing was so successful I keep thinking I have to exceed it.

That's not necessarily true.

It's kind of...
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I've started writing again. Inspired by going to a lecture proposing that religion be the subject of scientific inquiry. Interesting idea.

I've been working on this book for five years. I should finish it maybe.

No one said it would be easy but so many of my peers live like they've got it all together though it often looks to me like they've taken the path of least fear and pain.

But is that wrong?

Others have gone slowly inexorably fucking bonkers. Not enough to be institutionalized but just enough to live on a knife edge of mental hell.

I...
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This is one boring airport.

On the road again.