This morning I'm trying to figure out how to write an Interpersonal Relations paper on superheroes, and the functional associations of their alter egos and secret identities. For instance, Clark Kent wears glasses which socially marks him as sort of weak and nerdy, not the type typically assumed to be strong, powerful, and heroic. Batman uses a similar sort of psychology on boths sides of his persona.
My weekend has been kind of subpar. I've somehow managed to get wrapped up in all of this negativity that has me feeling like I want to kill myself, but deep down I know it is all bullshit. I don't want to kill myself, and my life isn't all that horrible. I know I can get past all of this angsty soul garbage. Right now I'm broke and I'm in school doing a whole of things that I could really care less about doing, and I'm isolating myself from people which is making me feel, well, isolated.
First, I'm swearing off television. Too often I have started to feel bad, and to numb it I just turn on my tv and slide off into an unconscious stupor. I think it is probably about as good for me as hitting myself in the head with a hammer over and over again.
I've been trying to reread books that changed my life and relive the feelings of peace and inspiration that they initially awakened in me, but it isn't working all that well. They are some help, but nothing compares to when you first undergo a spiritual chrysalis and breakthrough your illusions to really see the world for the first time.
I went riding my bike yesterday, just to try and get lost. I ended up in some wealthy neighborhood where all the streets had names like "Camelot" and "Cantebury" and "Stratford". I pretended I was like someone who had wandered into a strange land for the first time. To get there I had to ride through all of these pathways behind our nature preserve. I had to cross three bridges. On one side of those bridges everything was kind of poor and rundown, but on the other side it was idyllic. I tried to get lost on purpose, not paying any attention to the streets that I went down or their names. The houses were huge like castles. I eventually found my way back...
My weekend has been kind of subpar. I've somehow managed to get wrapped up in all of this negativity that has me feeling like I want to kill myself, but deep down I know it is all bullshit. I don't want to kill myself, and my life isn't all that horrible. I know I can get past all of this angsty soul garbage. Right now I'm broke and I'm in school doing a whole of things that I could really care less about doing, and I'm isolating myself from people which is making me feel, well, isolated.
First, I'm swearing off television. Too often I have started to feel bad, and to numb it I just turn on my tv and slide off into an unconscious stupor. I think it is probably about as good for me as hitting myself in the head with a hammer over and over again.
I've been trying to reread books that changed my life and relive the feelings of peace and inspiration that they initially awakened in me, but it isn't working all that well. They are some help, but nothing compares to when you first undergo a spiritual chrysalis and breakthrough your illusions to really see the world for the first time.
I went riding my bike yesterday, just to try and get lost. I ended up in some wealthy neighborhood where all the streets had names like "Camelot" and "Cantebury" and "Stratford". I pretended I was like someone who had wandered into a strange land for the first time. To get there I had to ride through all of these pathways behind our nature preserve. I had to cross three bridges. On one side of those bridges everything was kind of poor and rundown, but on the other side it was idyllic. I tried to get lost on purpose, not paying any attention to the streets that I went down or their names. The houses were huge like castles. I eventually found my way back...
The division of the neighborhoods. It's funny but you don't notice it when you are a little kid.