nocturnus

Before I forget, help me out...any of you have an idea who should play me if a movie were made about my life? There's a topic in the boards and I have no idea who to put.

On to the update...

I had a fairly good time, Friday night. First time in ages I have had a Friday night off. Several of us got together and went out to celebrate two friends' birthdays. The evening did not start as early as it was planned to, but then is that not always the way it happens? Still, I had a decent night shooting pool...not a great one...and everyone had a good time. It was the best I have been in, in a large social setting, for a long time.

My short term memory is becoming lousy. I was going to post something on the boards tonight that I am convinced was going to have been brilliant...a great topic that should have gotten a lot of response...and it escapes me.

It is annoying, but perhaps it will come back to me.

I know I bring it up often in these journal entries, but I can not stop feeling so anxious to begin recording my music at last. To have versions of my material laid down that are at the very least complete and listenable will be fantastic. I must admit, I am also anxious for all of you to hear it. Those of you that like metal should enjoy them at least somewhat.

Oh hell why not...here is a song I have written that Tunghook may be recording for the next album.

broken soul

what you see you can never forget, and
what you regret will always haunt you
injustice abounds despite your cries
watch helplessly as it continues
they deny the God you believed in;
crushing all that you have known
when they look again they find you laughing
they will learn to fear this romeo

innocence is stolen and new life begins
this boy is now man
the gift of rage one thing they can't take away

(ref)
i have stared into the abyss too long
ripped away from all that made me strong i do not back down
a monster i have come to be, so
thank the world for it made me
no remorse as i watch the end of those
that trampled on this broken soul

the final solution paled by first consequence, but
who pays; who stops to ask?
i can't wait to be alive; to know
what i feel when the jester's laugh dies down at last
i strive to be all that fate would deny, and you
given this dark gift for leaving me numb
aren't we all just somebody's daughter?
aren't we all just somebody's son?

won't be pushed away like another broken whore
been broken, cheated, hated, and ignored...but no more

(ref)

when the hatred is all gone
raise my head and look at what i've done
why do i mourn those who tortured me
why do i even feel at all?

breaking all of them has left me only colder than before
i'm left to realize that in the end they have still won

(ref to end)


Carpe Noctem