hey guys;
so i have had a pretty shit couple of days; in fact last night was the first time i'd slept in weeks. and all it took was 3 straight hours of crying and an insane cleaning session an unusual side effect of feeling that low. I woke up today to an new top which ill have to show you guys at some point because it's pure amazing, and really big swollen and sore eyes, and tbh the only reason i got up was so i could try my new top on.
i guess i just snapped last night; and suddenly everything id been holding back and keeping control of went to shit; and suddenly everything i pretend is okay wasn't.
I guess what really got to me is how i spend my entire life pretending i'm not constantly in pain and act like i'm not constantly tired and worn out because of it; and how i wish above anything this had waited to later in my life, because i am not going to have the chance to live my life like an 19 year old would; ill never be able to have a proper 9 to 5 job or party constantly; i have to spend my life thinking about everything i do and the way it will make me feel afterwards.
but hey; i'm moaning and i don't have it bad as some people so ill behave.
Blu was such a doll; and calmed me down so much last night' i really do love her so go show her love please. Shes like a guardian angel, i will never forgot how much she does for me; and can't wait to see her.
I've spent today looking through some old shoots; which has made me realise how much i have improved.
so i have had a pretty shit couple of days; in fact last night was the first time i'd slept in weeks. and all it took was 3 straight hours of crying and an insane cleaning session an unusual side effect of feeling that low. I woke up today to an new top which ill have to show you guys at some point because it's pure amazing, and really big swollen and sore eyes, and tbh the only reason i got up was so i could try my new top on.
![](https://dz3ixmv6nok8z.cloudfront.net/static/img/ph-508.604ed20cffa9.gif)
i guess i just snapped last night; and suddenly everything id been holding back and keeping control of went to shit; and suddenly everything i pretend is okay wasn't.
I guess what really got to me is how i spend my entire life pretending i'm not constantly in pain and act like i'm not constantly tired and worn out because of it; and how i wish above anything this had waited to later in my life, because i am not going to have the chance to live my life like an 19 year old would; ill never be able to have a proper 9 to 5 job or party constantly; i have to spend my life thinking about everything i do and the way it will make me feel afterwards.
but hey; i'm moaning and i don't have it bad as some people so ill behave.
Blu was such a doll; and calmed me down so much last night' i really do love her so go show her love please. Shes like a guardian angel, i will never forgot how much she does for me; and can't wait to see her.
![](https://dz3ixmv6nok8z.cloudfront.net/static/img/ph-508.604ed20cffa9.gif)
I've spent today looking through some old shoots; which has made me realise how much i have improved.
I still have no money so if anyone wants to buy an print please let me know;
all you have to do is email lauracharleyrob@gmail.com
A5- 3.50 A4- 6 plus postage
The other prints can be seen in my previous blog
thanks guys!
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
keep your head high, i love you <3<3<3